For this first draw, I pulled card 58, the third aspect of Tzadi. The card is subtitled "Disregarding emotions, fear of intimacy". On it, there is a couple, both in pointy brown hats. Yet, they don't look at each other. The woman sits on a chaise longue with a sad expression on her face, and reaches down to something on the floor. The man, facing in the opposite direction, is pulling on a thick, orange ribbon.
It's an interesting combination, disregarding emotions and fear of intimacy. I see the two being related: when we are afraid of intimacy, we tend to disregard emotions, both our own and those of the people around us. After all, if we deny the emotions present, we can more easily distance ourselves from the people expressing or eliciting them. These people, then, are keeping busy, each in their own way. And so they go about their own pursuits, too busy to feel or to have time for the other.
This certainly feels like it should be in the position of "What to Avoid"! My Dear One and I didn't have time to perform our ritual yesterday, but I hold out hope for today. And hopefully, it will be a way for us to connect with our emotion, and with each other. It would be good for us to do something uniting, as this week has been another tough one, this time because of Big Boy being ill again. Still, we have kept a united front in facing medical professionals and bureaucracy, so I trust we can face the emotions sure to be raised by this ritual.
I am grateful not to face life's difficulties alone.