Inner Whispers

Weekly Vlog Reading for 30th Jan

2012-01-29T12:00:00.007Z

I'm really enjoying the Watcher Angel Tarot (SpiralFire Studio, 2010), and decided to do a quick video reading with it for this week.

Once again, I have used Mark Ryan and John Matthews' Pathway Spread (from the Wildwood Tarot companion book).

The reading seemed very clear to me, and matches well with the message I received from the daily card this morning: I have been very critical of myself recently, and it really doesn't help! Hope the reading is useful for others, too...

Tragedy

2012-01-29T06:35:00.001Z

Despite its soft-coloured artwork and angelic energy, the Watcher Angel Tarot can still speak to the harder topics in life. Today's card is a case in point: the Ten of Swords has the keyword "Tragedy".

In the foreground, ten swords plunge into the grassy earth. Behind them, on a lake or sea, a burning boat drifts away from the shore, a floating funeral pyre. On a small jut of land, a caped figure stands, windswept and forlorn.

Letting go is never easy, whether it is a person, a pet, an idea or an aspect of ourselves that we must release. However, turning every ending into a tragedy may not be the most helpful response. Acknowledging what is ending without turning it into a drama, we can think of all that was, allow it its due time, and then turn our thoughts to pastures new.

What I'd like to release today is my craving for sweets. Having spent nearly a year avoiding processed sugar, I have succumbed again over the last month. There's one bit of me that says it should be okay for me to occasionally eat some biscuits, that it's no great tragedy. Another part says that I want to be in control of whether or not I eat sweets, and at the moment it doesn't feel that way. Last year, what helped me was a dream. Not being a lucid dreamer, though, I can't summon one on demand. Perhaps I need to come up with a spell to focus my intent...

I am grateful for fruit, nature's answer to chocolate.

Union

2012-01-28T06:00:00.002Z

This week I will be drawing from the fascinating Watcher Angel Tarot (self-published: SpiralFire Studio, 2011), which I did a video review of here.

What a lovely card to start the week! The Two of Cups, with the keyword "Union", shows a couple with their arms about one another looking up into a sky filled with shooting stars. They stand at the side of a lake, with young saplings springing up around them. The man's arm is raised, as though waving to the stars, and the woman holds a golden cup, with another at the man's feet.

Beyond the traditional associations of true love, soul connection, partnership, and seeing eye to eye, there is a sense of wonder and hope to this card. There is also a suggestion of the spiritual side to union - it makes me think of Starhawk's statement that all acts of love are sacred.

Today my Dear One is travelling an hour or so to a forest to go biking - single track. You can check out a video of this sport here (no-one related to me, but it is one of the places my DO goes). So, I see this card being less about romantic love and more about a union with my Higher Self. I hope to dedicate some time today to doing a couple of readings with this deck for the Tarot Blog Hop, which will be posted on the 31st of January at 12pm UTC (the successor to Greenwich Mean Time, can't really tell the difference).

I am grateful for some time to commune with spirit.

Watcher Angel Tarot Video Review

2012-01-28T01:35:00.000Z

This review is a bit longer than some of the others, as I talk quite a bit about the companion book. It's a fascinating read, covering subjects such as angel names and attributes, the Book of Enoch, and the creative process that led to the deck itself. In the review you can also see all 78 cards.

This is a lovely deck - I'm really enjoying its energy and artwork. It also has a really interesting take on the Court Cards - let's see if any of them come up this week ;) The author and deck creator is Michelle Belanger, and the talented artist is Jackie Williams. The deck can be bought direct from the illustrator at SpiralFire Studio.

Steampunk Teaser

2012-01-27T16:35:00.003Z

Before leaving Steampunk behind until April, when Barbara Moore's Steampunk Tarot is due to be released, I thought I'd post this picture. Finally, here is the framed consolation prize print of the High Priestess that I received from the fabulously generous Barbara at the end of last year. I think the frame does it justice, though I'm not sure the photo does :/ My Dear One and I still have to negotiate where it will hang, but doesn't she look gorgeous?

And a quick reminder, if you're a TABI Member, or if you join up between now and March, you can net yourself a copy of this fun tarot deck for more than £5 off the amazon price, and with the companion book signed by Barbara, as well as an additional surprise gift!

Family Fun

2012-01-27T06:35:00.002Z

Charissa Drengsen's Steampunk Tarot offers an image of chaos and yet joy with today's card, the Ten of Cups.

There is something so fun and cheerful about this card, despite the rambunctious bedlam it portrays. Clowns and showgirls, schoolgirls and teachers, and an eccentric aunt in love with her gramaphone; this card is a reminder that families often have patterns that feel normal to those within them, but feel totally bizarre to an outsider (even if that outsider is a member).

I notice, too, the sign above their heads - Welcome Home. Home is not just about the place where we live, but about all the people we share our lives with in one way or another. It reminds me that while our blood family is chosen by birth, we get to choose the family of our heart.

So, what does all of this have to do with my day? Well, for one thing I'm translating a letter for my step-father. When it came through, I wasn't hugely keen - three sides of customer complaints and engineering jargon! However, he is the kindest, most caring and generous man I know. So, I should have it finished by mid-morning :)

I am grateful for my family in all its shapes and guises.

Beakers and Bunsens

2012-01-26T06:40:00.002Z

OK, so the title is a bit of a liberty, as there are no apparent Bunsen burners in this image. Still, today's card from the Steampunk Tarot (Drengsen, 2010) hints at the scientific.

In the foreground, we see a woman's body with her head outside of the frame. She pours a dark liquid from one silver jug into another. Her costume is elegant if old-fashioned, yet there is a cartoony tattoo on her arm - a strange mix of old and new. The background is marked off in grids, and there are scientific objects - a valve-like beaker and other glassware. I like the association of scientific measuring out of ingredients, which has a very (al)chemical feel to it. This fits well with my understanding of Temperance, where a carefully thought out balance of different elements or factors is necessary: the right mix to create the desired outcome.

Today, the mix I must get right is a balance of work, exercise, study, shopping and, if I can, editing a video I recorded yesterday. Plus spending time with my family. If I get the right balance, it'll feel like I've had a productive, positive day :)

I am grateful for having a varied life.

Tophat and T-Shirt

2012-01-25T06:00:00.021Z

After yesterday's Queen, today we get the King of Pentacles from the Steampunk Tarot (Drengsen, 2010).

I quite like this cheerful chap's expression. There is a certain droll challenge in his look, and a jaunty tilt to his tophat. He holds his golden roulette wheel nonchalantly, yet at the centre of his chest. The wallpaper behind him is opulent, very colonial. I do wonder, though, at the fact he is wearing a t-shirt under his jacket. Perhaps this points to this King enjoying the finer things in life, yet also prioritising his own comfort.

Today I hope to have some time for myself, after a couple of days taken up with work, study, and Big Boy being ill and having doctor's appointments. However, I see instead the need to get some practical matters dealt with - organising some work and household matters for the coming month. Like the King of Pentacles, I need to take charge of the day-to-day, in order to earn my roulette wheel and be able to lounge around in my t-shirt ;)

I am grateful for the ability to be organised when I need to, and for the joys of modern software that helps in the task.

Strange Queen

2012-01-24T06:00:00.030Z

After yesterday, with one of the cards I most like from this deck, today Clarissa Drengsen's Steampunk Tarot ups the ante, offering me a challenge in the form of the Queen of Pentacles.

In my video review I identified this as a card I'm uncertain about. Someone holds a mini-roulette wheel in front of the woman's eye (the hand that holds those scissor/tong things can't be hers - look at the way the hand is facing!) Across that eye is a swathe of material with cogs on it, and the Queen has a hand to her chin, pensive.

Does she look at life through a prism of material and financial understandings? That feels more like the King of Pentacles to me. How about seeing what lies underneath appearances to how things tick? That would seem to be the Page of Pentacles' purview. Is she crafting things together from different bits and pieces to make something worthwhile for herself and her loved ones? That would represent more of what I traditionally associate with this Queen's entrepreneurial nature.

What resonates with me today is actually the strange tongs, in a somewhat negative sense. I am taking Big Boy to see a specialist, someone who operated on him last year. So, an association with medical equipment and the practicalities of doctor's visits. And I guess the nurturing side of the Queen of Pents is there, taking care of the physical needs of my child.

I am grateful for the wonders of modern medicine, that can patch up many an ill.

Of Whips and Woods

2012-01-23T06:00:00.008Z

I'm not quite sure why, but I find today's card from the Steampunk Tarot (Charissa Drengsen, 2010) incredibly powerful. Hmm, perhaps taking a deeper look will show me why...

In this version of the Ace of Swords we see that Charissa associates the suit of Swords with whips. It's an association that I think works well - whips are still a weapon, and one with which we can beat either ourselves or others.

Here we see a whip held high, ready to be brought down on some unsuspecting person. It is held aloft by a hand, the only bit of colour in a cold, grey, wintery scene. In the distance, a man walks under a bridge. Is he walking towards us or away? Overhead, a dark branch reaches down, intimating that we are surrounded by trees. Yet there is clearer air in the distance. With this whip we can get things moving, and pass into greater clarity. There is no promise of warmth, but there is the potential for movement and opening up ideas.

That fits pretty well with my day, I guess. Back to college for supervision. I don't like the person I've been assigned this term. He seems very cerebral, and insists we back up everything with theory, whereas I see counselling as being much more about emotion. Of course, you need to understand the theories behind it all, but always take them with a pinch of salt, is what most of our tutors have said. This guy hears a single word and asks me to justify it by naming the theorist on which I'm basing the use of that word in that context - ack! Ah well, perhaps the intellectual rigour will do me good...

I am grateful that I don't always feel like I'm beating a dead horse.

No Good Deed...

2012-01-22T06:00:00.022Z

In this Steampunk Tarot by Charissa Drengsen, Pentacles are represented by what I take to be roulette wheels. I think it's a great symbolic association!

I also like the decorative effect achieved in this card, where the aspect of give and take is suggested mainly by the scales and the difference in dress between the high class lady and the ragamuffin children. A lovely touch, too, to have the lady in colour and the kids in sepia tones!

Will the lady give the children some food? Might they, in turn, steal her rings? As the saying goes, no good deed goes unpunished... Still, I would rather think that she will feed them and give them a few coins to take back to their family, and they will thank her, bring a smile to her face, and help her out should they ever have the opportunity.

Today my Dear One and I head home after our lovely spa break. Did we deserve it? I think so... Will we be grateful to the people who cared for Big Boy while we were away? Most definitely! And what is the greatest gift I will receive today? Hugs from my boy!

I am grateful for time away, and even more for the reunion.

Death and the Lady

2012-01-21T06:00:00.047Z

This week I will be drawing from Charissa Drengsen's Steampunk Tarot, which I reviewed earlier in the week and also used for a video reading. It is a lovely self-published deck which first came out in 2010. I think the photo collage aspect with old-fashioned images juxtaposed with scientific implements and strange costumes works very well for a genre that calls itself retro-futuristic and which highlights reusing and re-functioning objects of all kinds.

I have to admit, one reason why I got this deck was as a place-holder while I wait for Barbara Moore's fabulous-looking Steampunk Tarot, due out this April. I am more of a fan of cartoon art than photo collage, and I think Barbara is a fabulous writer and tarotist, so it's high on my wishlist for this year! For any TABI-ites reading, or anyone considering joining, there's a wonderful offer for those going in on a TABI group pre-order. Not only do we get more than £5 off the Amazon price (that's already over half of the TABI annual membership fee!), but the companion books will be signed by Barbara, and she's promised a little something extra, too (don't you just love surprises?!) For those outwith the UK, you'd have to pay whatever postage costs were beyond the UK postage, but it's still a bargain, and a treat! So, if you're a member head over to the forum and search for Steampunk, and if you're not, think about joining!

Anyhow, back to Charissa Drengsen's Steampunk Tarot, and for this first draw I pulled Death. One benefit of a self-published deck is that it can be quirkier and less mainstream than if it went through a big publishing house. That is certainly the case here, as this is a rather racy version of Death. There is a naked, veiled woman with a skeleton standing over her, his scythe poised between her legs. I like this, suggesting as it does the link between death, sexuality, and new beginnings...

Sexual pleasure has an aspect of death to it: we let go of our sense of self, if only for a few moments, to become one with another. This letting go can be quite hard, it feels scary to be so vulnerable, and to lose our everyday control and notions of who we are. And it can be so messy ;) Yep, definitely like death. As for the benefits, though...

This is my card for the year, and I can certainly get behind this: a need to let go of ideas about what I should be doing, and who I should be; to allow myself to just enjoy the moment, whatever it brings. Still, those things may need to be mourned before I can move on. As for today, we're here at a lovely spa in the English countryside. So, what I hope to let go of are stress and other people's expectations - and a bit of nooky wouldn't go amiss!

I am grateful for some time away with my love, with no deadlines, and not even a mobile phone :o

Steampunk Tarot Reading

2012-01-20T12:00:00.012Z

Here's a video reading using the Steampunk Tarot by Charissa Drengsen. I used the Pathway Spread (devised by Mark Ryan and John Matthews) to look at the week ahead.

This deck reads beautifully, and after the fact I thought that this reading is also quite appropriate to my weekend away. The Queen of Wands indicating a time of sensuality, the Five of Wands saying not to be argumentative with my Dear One, and the Magician saying that we can make this weekend exactly what we want it to be... ;D

I also see in it the situation of a friend of mine who has his PhD viva today: he needs to be passionate and persuasive about his subject, without getting into academic arguments with the assessors. However, he has already done the work, and knows all the material. As long as he focuses on that, it's in the bag!

Mountebank

2012-01-20T06:00:00.002Z

I'm not sure I like today's card from the Oracle of Visions much.

He reminds me of the tarot Magician, but there's something in his face and clothes that screams mountebank. Rather than manifesting his ideas, he seems to be just for show, perhaps trying to trick us into something. Delighting in the impossible, and pretending it's all real, I certainly wouldn't buy a used car from him. This card reminds me to beware of things that seem too good to be true, or people who are offering something that seems amazing.

Today my Dear One and I head off for our weekend away, which we've been planning for two months. In this there is more of traditional Magician traits - making an idea into a reality. We're going to a spa recommended by my MIL, I hope it doesn't disappoint.

I am grateful for the joys of a plan coming to fruition.

Love Letter?

2012-01-19T06:00:00.009Z

Today's card from the Oracle of Visions (Ciro Marchetti, 2011) certainly has romance going for it!

A woman in a purple, bustled dress faces left, a wax-sealed letter in one hand and a red rose in the other. Behind her, a flock of black swans (or geese?) fly.

The juxtaposition of the letter and rose with the woman's dark clothes and demeanour, and the birds flying off, makes me think of planning or announcing an elopement. Although there is love and passion involved, there is also sadness at leaving something behind. Of course, in this day and age not many people feel the need to elope, but the point is more about the things we do for love, and the price we may pay for them. Another interpretation might be that this is a Dear John (or Jane) letter, which once again would hint at the price of love, and the choices we make. Or, of course, it could just be telling us to expect or to send a message to someone.

Today, this card makes me think about competing loves: my Dear One and Big Boy. Of course, they are not always in competition. However, tomorrow my Dear One and I leave for a weekend away, without our son. It's only the second time we've done this since he was born, and I'm a little nervous, despite leaving him with loving people who know him well. We need a break, and I think it generally a good idea for parents to take some time to be a couple, not just parents. Still, I worry about how BB will feel, and whether, like a cat when their humans return from holiday, he will make his displeasure known upon our return...

I am grateful for some time to relax, unwind and be with the love of my life.

Steampunk Tarot Review

2012-01-18T12:00:00.008Z

No, Barbara Moore and Aly Fell's Steampunk Tarot hasn't released several months early, more's the shame, and if anyone would like to send me a review copy... ;)

This is a video review of Charissa Drengsen's Steampunk Tarot, self-published in 2010. Not heard of it? It's a delightful little deck (poker card size) with photo collage images. Go on, take a look...

Growing

2012-01-18T06:00:00.018Z

I think this is one of my favourite cards in Ciro's Oracle of Visions deck!

First and foremost, I love the way a tree is growing up her spine. I don't really see it as a tattoo, more as a symbol of her connection with the world about her. Strong roots and reaching branches echo the muscles and veins in her body, and the trunk curves as her spine moves. This is emphasised in the way she forms a perch for a nest with two eggs, and a beautiful bird.

It was only on about my fourth viewing that I noticed the horse was actually a unicorn, and it took another glance before I spotted the squirrel in the tree. I also love the little waterfall - a bit of movement that emphasises the calm stillness of the water beneath it.

For me, this card is all about our connection to nature, our ability to nurture, and the strength and clarity we gain from being in nature. Like a cross between the Empress and the World, it is Gaia at her most wonderful.

Today I see a client who is a mother, and I hope to be able to nurture her a little, so she in turn can nurture her child. I wonder, too, whether I can make time to go for a walk on the heath, to clear my head a little from all the craziness of life...

I am grateful for the magical calm of a walk in the woods.

Reach Out

2012-01-17T06:25:00.001Z

Today's image from the Oracle of Visions (Ciro Marchetti, 2011) seems like a cross between steampunk, magic and the performing arts - three influences that all seem quite strong in this deck.

Looking at this image, the song "Reach Out and Touch Somebody's Hand" echoes in my head. What kind of magical contraption is he holding to connect to his distant love? These days we have so many means of communication at our disposal. Do they make our messages clearer? How close do we really feel to those who are not with us in the flesh?

I notice, too, the juggling sticks he holds, and the stars that decorate his body - an ability to shine at something we do, even if we have to balance different projects or aspects of life. His muscular acrobats body speaks of years of practice and hard-work to achieve this mastery.

Below the magical communication device are a face mask and a flame - the soul burns brightly, with no need to hide, yet he keeps his options open - we do not always have to show all that we are to everyone. Communication involves a willingness to be seen and heard, as well as a willingness to see and hear the other - both sides are necessary to truly connect.

Today I don't have to rely on modern (or magical) means of communication. We are going for tea with some friends who had a baby on the Winter Solstice - meeting my goddaughter or whatever the equivalent is if you're not Christian. Also, another friend who has got a job in the South Pacific is back for a few days on business, and staying with them. So, instead of relying on email, we shall see him in person, perhaps for the last time in three years (his contract time).

I am grateful for the many ways of connecting with others that are available.

Intuition and Magic

2012-01-16T06:30:00.001Z

Ciro Marchetti's Oracle of Visions if full of wondrous and magical images, and today's card is no exception, offering up a vision of faeries.

Wearing a large, ornate-yet-delicate crown, with a veil, and sitting between two pillars, she has something of the High Priestess to her. The woman watches as faeries pour forth from the lidded cup she holds open. A combination of intuition and magic, then, an opening to the Otherworld through introspection and ritual.

How I would interpret this card would definitely depend a lot on who I was reading for. From a suggestion to open oneself to the magic of the everyday, seeking joy in everything and looking around oneself with eyes of wonder rather than scepticism, to a suggestion of opening to psychic powers and communing with the faeries, this lady offers messages of magic available to whatever degree we allow ourselves to believe in it.

Seeing the faeries as creatures who could gather information without people being aware of their presence also allows for the interpretation of being open to messages from our unconscious, from our intuition. A suggestion that, if we pay attention, we will know the answers we seek about those around us.

For me, today, I think this card holds a message of paying close attention to what is going on around me, and adapting myself to fit. It is my second class with a new supervisor/tutor, and I think his ideas are very different to mine. Despite being of a philosophy that advocates challenging fixed ideas, I'm not sure he's willing to challenge his own preconceptions. So, I may need to stick to what he will accept, rather than offering up alternate possibilities.

I am grateful for the strength of my intuition, when I choose to use it.

Orlando

2012-01-15T07:15:00.001Z

I find today's card from Ciro Marchetti's Oracle of Visions a little confusing.

While the person has obvious (though subtle) breasts and long hair, their chin looks like it is stubbled. The butterflies released from a cage suggest breaking out of old ways of being, and transformation. Is this meant to be a nod to Orlando?

I notice, too, the chess set with just the Red King left on the board, checkmated. When there is nowhere left to go, perhaps we need to think outside the box?

Finally, there is the little kitten, gazing in wonder at the yellow butterfly flitting above. There is joy in transformation, as well as necessity. The person, too, gazes at the butterfly, flying free. Perhaps they do not feel that same freedom to be themselves, fully and without question.

Today is a quiet day for me, not many obvious opportunities for self-questioning and transformation. Still, I feel like I'm in an on-going process of digesting the Tower situation on Thursday. It's mainly in terms of questioning my beliefs again, though this time around what it means to be a mother.

I am grateful for the opportunity to transform my perceptions.

Mother Time

2012-01-14T06:00:00.032Z

Ha, how funny is that? Today, the same card that came out to play in yesterday's video blog shows her face again! Drawing from the Oracle of Visions (Ciro Marchetti, 2011), we meet Mother Time.

To me, she feels like a cross between the inward-looking intuitive aspects of the High Priestess, and the time and wisdom aspects of the Hermit. She reminds us to be true to ourselves, to seek spiritual knowledge. She also reminds us that this often requires us to let go of the past, to let go of received wisdom, and to be in the moment. She doesn't try to cling to what was, but allows time to flow, knowing that there will be beauty in each moment, magic always at our fingertips. She may light our way sometimes, but she also tells us that only we can walk it - that each one of us has our own journey in life. And that ultimately we must trust that we will find the path that suits us best.

One of the messages for me here is about not letting past failures stop me from acting now. Just because I have not done something, or not done it to my satisfaction, in the past, has no bearing on what I do now. I get to choose anew in each moment.

I am grateful for the reminder to choose wisely in each moment of life, without regrets for the past.

Video Reading for the Week to Come

2012-01-13T12:00:00.005Z

Now that I'm back to video blogging, I decided to do a reading as well as the reviews I posted earlier this week. I don't guarantee that these readings will happen every week, but it was fun to do one again.

Starting tomorrow I will be using Ciro Marchetti's gorgeous Oracle of Visions. So, here I draw a single card from that deck to represent the energy around the week to come...

Poking a Snake

2012-01-13T06:45:00.001Z

The Universal Wirth Tarot ends on a run of Majors.

Today's card is the Hermit, though he's rather a temerarious one: I wouldn't want to go rashly poking at a snake with a stick! He holds his light high, to better see what he's doing. Interpreting this card as I might a dream, I take the snake to be another aspect of the Hermit. Thus he tries to illuminate his own capacity for transformation. Self-study, then, for the purpose of spiritual development and change.

In some instances, self-development is best aided by other people. However, with the Hermit the suggestion is that we take time out, by ourselves, to look inward as well as possibly studying from books.

Today I need to get some work done. After that, though, perhaps I can make the time to read a fascinating book that arrived yesterday. I also feel the need to digest some of what came out emotionally yesterday. Meditation seems in order...

I am grateful for the wisdom to be found in books, which I can read and process in my own time.

Gravity

2012-01-12T06:00:00.020Z

Another Major from the Universal Wirth Tarot graces my screen this morning - my old friend the Tower!

Two men fall from a crumbling Tower. Both wear Fool's motley, though one bears a crown, while the other has a peasant's hat on. Yet gravity cares not for status, age or any other GRACES - both plummet to earth just the same. Nothing can protect us from having our ideas challenged, our lives turned upside down, our sense of self forever altered.

Tower moments come in all shapes and sizes, from looking in the mirror one day and seeing your mother, to a car crash that leaves you wheelchair-bound. What matters is how we respond to them, the ways we find to deal with them. I notice, too, the grass into which the figures are falling. So, perhaps something about how we can soften our landings.

I already have a sense of what this card is about, even though it's only 6am my time. Today I find out something, one way or another. In either case it'll be a bit of a shake-up, either of my plans or of my sense of self. I try to remind myself that a shake-up is a wake-up, and doesn't have to be seen as a bad thing...

I am grateful for the chance to imagine my life being different.

Oracle of Visions Video Review

2012-01-11T15:30:00.005Z

OK, so I've been feeling inspired just lately! Here is another review, quite different to the last. I look at the Oracle of Visions deck by Ciro Marchetti (Self Published, 2011). As I go through all the cards quite quickly, I didn't feel it was necessary to edit in lots of extras. Apologies for the glare on some of the cards, I hope it isn't too distracting. Once again, let me know what you think. Do you prefer this style, or the other one? Or don't really mind? This one was a lot less work... :)

Mixed Sauna

2012-01-11T06:20:00.001Z

The Universal Wirth Tarot Majors, with their old-fashioned colours, nevertheless manage to bring some interesting twists to traditional archetypes.

Today's card, the Sun, is a case in point. Instead of a boy on a horse, or two children dancing, we have a man and a woman clothed only in cloths tied around their waists. She wears a blue cloth, colour of communication and emotion, while he wears a red cloth, colour of passion and life at its most basic level. They stand in a circle of flowers, under a bright Sun, with sunny droplets like beads of sweat around them. Is the Sun dripping its energy down to them, all that brightness brought into a more human, useable form? The message I see here is about the need for balance in order to best utilize the energy at our disposal.

Today I have another busy day ahead, with lots to do, but little structure to help me do it. Some work, some studying, some exercise, as well as my role as carer...

I am grateful for the reminder to check my priorities and balance my needs and responsibilities to make the most of my time and energy.

Goddesses and Sirens Video Review

2012-01-10T15:30:00.023Z

As you can guess from this post's title, I have finally made the time to get my video camera out again. This go-around I decided to do something a bit different (for me). Instead of a reading, it's my first video review. I hope you'll let me know what you think!

The review is of the Goddesses and Sirens Oracle by Stacey Demarco and Jimmy Manton (Blue Angel Publishing, 2011).

Fiery Knight

2012-01-10T06:45:00.003Z

It's always nice to get a cross-section of cards from a deck, to assess it, so I'm glad that today the Universal Wirth Tarot offers us a Court card: the Knight of Wands.

This Knight is all armoured up, charging forwards with his sword in hand. In front and above him is a ram's head, suggesting his connection with Aries. Below him is an armoured helm at the centre of two crossed wands, with fire running around them. It seems as though he is charging across a blue, somewhat cloudy sky.

I have to say, this image offers somewhat mixed symbolism. While the wands, the fire and the ram all point to typical traits of this Knight, the sword and the skyscape are more suggestive of the Knight of Swords.

As with Ciro Marchetti's Legacy of the Divine Tarot, the Knights all have a helmet on their card. Ciro says he made this choice to represent the fact that Knight energy is often rather brash - putting on a face and a role, rather than really having incorporated the suit's energy the way the more mature Queen and King have. I rather like this take on the Knight status.

So, what I see here is the energy to be decisive, passionate and enthusiastic, perhaps beyond reason. Charging into things on a bit of a whim, there is the danger that there won't be much follow-through. Still, if there's a decision to be made and action to be taken then this Knight is your man, so to speak.

Yesterday was my first day back at college - I just have a two hour class once a week now. However, I volunteered to do the first presentation to this supervision group next week, so I need to get moving on that. Given that I also have a work project that need finishing today, I hope I can draw on this Knight's gumption to get me going.

I am grateful for a shot of energy and enthusiasm.

Friendship

2012-01-09T06:30:00.050Z

Another card from the Minor Arcana today shows again the very different perspective which the Universal Wirth Tarot offers us.

In this version of the Three of Wands, we have three wands arranged in a triangle, point up. In the centre of the triangle is a caduceus, symbol of healing. Below is the trunk of a bush, from which branches sprout, reaching out in all directions. Above the triangle we have the head of a dog.

What I see here is a message about the power of friendship or companionship to help us both heal and grow. Often, people in our society feel they have to be self-sufficient, to be able to take care of themselves physically and emotionally. In reality, though, we are social creatures who need others for our well-being. Even when we are alone, we hold conversations in our head with imagined others, or think about how others would see us. This doesn't mean we are weak, it just acknowledges that we are all part of a web of relationships. Without that human contact, as children our brains wouldn't develop, and as adults it is hard to stave off depression. We need others, to be whole mentally and physically. Denying that is one of the worst side-effects of individualism.

I am grateful for the web of support that surrounds me. From my Dear One and Big Boy to my friends, from my parents to the people in the shops I frequent who smile and take the time to say hello, from my fellow students to the strangers I share a train carriage with.

Spiritual Rising

2012-01-08T06:00:00.051Z

The Minor Arcana in the Universal Wirth Tarot are a new addition to the deck which, as with most pre-RWS decks, had unillustrated pips. They are very unusual - quite simple yet still expressive.

Today's card is a perfect case in point. This Seven of Wands shows the wands in two formations - a square and a triangle, stability and creativity. Within the square, animals representative of the four main apostles or the four elements - an eagle (air), a ram (fire), a bull (earth) and a crustacean (water). The sense I get from this is that we need a solid foundation, a good grounding in our subject, before we can get creative. The passion and excitement of the Ace of Wands has, in this card, been shored up by hard work so that it is ready to manifest in creative ways. This is true whether we are talking about a work project, and hobby, or spiritual seeking.

I notice, too, that the overall shape formed is like that of a house drawn by a child - a triangular roof on a square house. That sense of being able to do something you believe in, based on solid foundations, can also feel like a home-coming, arriving at who you really are.

Today we head home. So, a less metaphorical home-coming. Perhaps I will feel illuminated and refreshed from this quick break...

I am grateful for a home that I love, and for feeling at home with myself.

Colourful Devil

2012-01-07T06:00:00.044Z

After last week's bizarre, sci-fi/fantasy/horror deck I decided to go for something more traditional this week. Though admittedly this is a re-imagining of a historic deck, rather than the real deal: the Universal Wirth Tarot (Lo Scarabeo, 2008).

And starting the week off with a bang, today's card is the Devil. Harking back to early depictions, we see a figure with huge horns and breasts, and the suggestion of male sexual appendages covered by the devil-horned mercury symbol worn over a loincloth, and cloven hooves. On the Devil's arms, the words "solve" and "coagula" (dissolve and coagulate, sometimes translated as separate and join together) with their alchemical implications. At the Devil's feet, two demons or imps, brightly coloured, one male and one female.

For me, this card is a reminder that many times it is in our search to perfect ourselves that we fall into the worst binds, trapped by our own prejudices which blind us to any other option. Or it might be to do with our inability to live up to the high standards we set ourelves. This can lead to a downward cycle, the "well, I've messed up so I may as well give up and mess up even worse" mentality.

Today we drive back to Munich to spend the day and break up our trip home. I wonder whether this card is about the "fall" I often feel coming off the high of being in busy social situations...

I am grateful for the reminder to beware of extremes of emotion and the unhelpful behaviours they can lead to.

Snailmaid

2012-01-06T06:00:00.065Z

OK, today's image from the Tarot of Metamorphosis is almost Dali-esque in it's surreality...

A snail woman stands at the edge of the sea, her shell decorated with the symbols traditionally found on the RWS Wheel. The woman holds a huge daisy, and to the side and behind her are a skull and an apple. Behind her, a ram-headed male statue has trees growing out of his shoulders. A ship sails in the distance.

This card makes me think of a number of things. Firstly, the fact of being on the seashore puts her in a liminal place, like the woman in the DruidCraft version of this card. Secondly, I hear phrases or sayings that may relate to the Wheel archetype, for example: "going at a snail's pace", "the sands of time", "that ship has sailed", "gone but not forgotten", and "hope springs eternal". I guess it's not the phrases so much as their juxtaposition that hints at the changeability of the Wheel. Thirdly, there's the comparison of the live female and the dead (or is he?) statue, and then the phrase "this too shall pass" pops into my head. A very chatty card, somehow...

Today, we celebrate the Wheel turning for my step-grandmother. Another year of her life, another chance to celebrate and be with family, and what does the year ahead hold? I'm very conscious of the different places that we are all at in our lives. I am the eldest of my cousins, and with the eldest child, though the other great-grandkids followed along in quick succession. Of six cousins, four of us have kids, and the other two are still at school/studying. Well, two of us with kids are also studying, go figure... I'm not sure I can put my sense of the ebb and flow of life into words, but it is interesting to try to feel it, especially when surrounded by these like-and-yet-different others.

I am grateful for occasions that help mark life's patterns, and allow family to come together.

Transforming Teamwork

2012-01-05T06:00:00.018Z

I’m not quite sure what to make of today’s card from the Tarot of Metamorphosis.

In traditional Six of Wands cards we see someone being feted for their success. The fact that there is generally a group around them is often taken as indicating that team work is needed, and should perhaps be appreciated, rather than just basking in the joy of individual achievement. I guess there is a touch of that here in the fact of two figures back-to-back - acting as mutual support in the creation of something bigger than either of them alone. I notice the strange butterfly figure in the water below them, too, speaking of transformation and perhaps of being inspired by larger-than-life figures.

Today will certainly require teamwork from us - we're going on a family trip to visit relatives in Germany. Tomorrow, my step-grandmother celebrates her birthday, and there'll be 40 or so people there. For today, though, what it means is a flight to Germany and then a two-and-a-half hour drive. Not the most fun at the best of times, and travelling with a four year old who doesn't like flying and is prone to tantrums definitely doesn't count as the best of times. Still, I've been preparing for several days, and hopefully have all we need to keep him cheerful and distracted. My Dear One plays his part, managing the heavy lifting, and the actual packing of the suitcase, after I decide what to take. He used to be a Boy Scout, and is adept at fitting things in. As for Big Boy, his role is as team motivator, I guess ;) And once we're there, various family members will hopefully help out with keeping him amused while we unpack and prepare everything...

I am grateful for all the help I can get.

Balancing Worlds

2012-01-04T06:00:00.042Z

Back to sci-fi today with the Tarot of Metamorphosis.

A metallic gargoyle figure looks out over a strange pagoda, while in the sky beyond two moons or planets float low to the horizon, one pink, one turquoise. Despite the unusual imagery, I still see the message of balance coming through strongly here. Balancing nature and machine, large and small, masculine and feminine, beauty and horror. Seeing the winged, taloned figure gazing down from his perch makes me think of the view he would have from up there. It must be easier to balance different things if you can get an overview of the situation...

There's also something awe-inspiring about the two moons - their beauty and size, and the idea of something so alien.

Today I am juggling work and preparing for a trip tomorrow, as well as exercise (not a question of discipline, it keeps me sane) and caring for Big Boy. I could do with some of the perspective the main figure seems to have: to assess what should be done when for best effect. I'll try to keep in mind that I love all these different things, even while I may struggle to manage them all. And at least my Dear One is still on holiday, and so can help, as we also have to have the electricity company in (turns out our metere has melted and is a safety hazard).

I am grateful for an extra pair of hands around the house.

Waspish Page

2012-01-03T06:00:00.018Z

Hmm, maybe there's also a bit of the horror genre in this deck. Certainly, today's card from the Tarot of Metamorphosis gives me the heebie-jeebies.

Like a weird cross between Mary Poppins and some horror movie (can't think of the name, I don't tend to watch them, but I'm sure there was one like this), this Page of Swords takes flight, dissolving into his constituent wasp parts. There is certainly a sting in the tail of this Page, and I can imagine his comments being sharp - lots of small, pointed quips that hurt.

On the up-side, I guess he doesn't see truth as a single thing, being open to numerous perspectives. Also, he allows his ideas to raise him up, taking flight on a whim and a dream.

Today it's back to work for me, both seeing clients and reading for my dissertation. However, this Page's umbrella makes me think of a novel that should arrive later today that I'd love to get stuck into. Recommended by Barbara Moore last summer, it looks fun - Soulless: The Parasol Protectorate by Gail Carriger. Definitely one I could get transported by :)

I am grateful for the wealth of ideas and books in the world.

Generation Cyborg

2012-01-02T06:00:00.010Z

Today, the Tarot of Metamorphosis shows its Sci-Fi side...

I don't see much of the apprentice in this card, though I guess the aspect of working hard could be seen in having to follow so many different perspectives at once. I notice, though, that his "face" is blank - information overload?

This cyborg fellow with his old-fashioned computer monitor head and strange long-limbed body also makes me think of how people are attached to machines. Watching an episode of the first season of Two and a Half Men two nights ago, Alan and Judith were trying to organise their calendars - PDA's which in this day and age would be half the size with a hundred times the functionality. We get so used to seeing people everywhere gazing at their smartphones, it seems bizarre to think back to the early '80's when the Filofax was the accessory of the year!

Today is Big Boy's fourth birthday, and he is definitely of the generation that uses technology as naturally as breathing. He loves "his" iPad, and the software we have on it just for him. Makes me wonder in what other ways his experience will be different to mine, growing up in this far more technological era. Still, we read him books often enough that they won't seem a foreign territory to him, even if in the future he does read them on a Kindle (or on his iPad) rather than on paper.

I am grateful for four years of learning and growing with my beautiful son.

Camouflage

2012-01-01T07:00:00.015Z

Happy 2012 everyone! On this New Year's Day, the bizarre Tarot of Metamorphosis (Lo Scarabeo, 2005) offers us a rather eery version of the 7 of Swords.

Thinking of traditional notions of trickery or deception, I notice one "person" hidden in the foliage at the centre of the card, and possibly another hidden behind the tree creature. So, ideas of camouflage, and hiding in plain sight. There also seems to be an all-seeing eye at the bottom of the card. Makes me wonder, in a given situation, who sees what...

I also notice that the tree person is sustained by branches that act like veins and arteries, with no obvious bones. This suggests we think about what sustains us and what holds us up or holds us together.

There are certainly some things I tend to hide from others. Today, though, the friend I have known for longest - since I was 4 years old - is coming to visit. She isn't someone I feel the need to hide much from, and she definitely counts among those I feel helps sustain me, with her sense of humour and her sound advice, and her willingness to listen and share. We shall do some New Year's readings together and chat and laugh - perfect!

I am grateful that not all old acquaintances are forgotten.

Blending In

2011-12-31T06:30:00.002Z

This week we see the change from 2011 to 2012. So, I decided to draw from the Tarot of Metamorphosis (Lo Scarabeo, 2005) which is all about change and transitions. It's a fairly non-traditional deck, a strange fantasy/sci-fi hybrid which is quite surreal.

On this New Year's Eve, the card I pulled is the Two of Wands. Rather than someone contemplating the world from on high, here we have a rather gentle-looking swamp man. Flowers, grass and foliage grow from his hands and hair. An iguana sits on his head, looking rather worried, while a hummingbird sups from a flower growing from his left index finger. His expression is beatific: calm and meditative.

What I see here is a suggestion to examine what is around us and how we fit into the world. A reminder, too, that no man is an island: we are always part of the web of life, connected to the other beings on this planet.

Today we are planning a mellow day, with perhaps a walk on the local heath. I'm highly unlikely to see in the New Year - Big Boy gets up far too early for me to stay up that late :( In this card, I see the suggestion to take time to think about my life and intentions rather than it referring to anything specifically going on. How about you, what plans do you have for the New Year?

I am grateful for the web of support that sustains me, and which I also contribute to.

Arwen's Wind of Change Spread

2011-12-30T17:30:00.001Z

Recently, Arwen (of Tarot by Arwen) was inspired to create a spread based on a Chinese proverb. I thought it sounded like the perfect thing for a quick reading on the year to come. So, I decided to give it a whirl with the beautiful Crystal Visions Tarot.

The positions are:

1) What wind of change is blowing my way?

In this position, I drew the Ace of Swords. Wow, this is definitely about change! Just look at those clouds blowing about, the butterflies flying, and the roses growing around the ruby-encrusted sword with an eagle-winged pommel. A new idea that has the potential to transform the way I see things, the start of a new way of communicating.

I see in this the fact that I have now finished the taught part of my Masters. From now on, I have to take the lead myself, getting to work on my dissertation. I will also be continuing on seeing clients, hopefully bringing new insights into how I work with them.

I wonder, too, on a more personal level whether this is about the way I communicate with those in my life. This is something I've been discussing a fair bit in therapy, and which came up for me quite strongly over Christmas. Hmm, not so keen on that, but then, it isn't just about what I want or feel comfortable with...

2) What wall do I create to block change? I love how Arwen described this as us having a "stubborn, inner donkey moment" :D

My card for this is the Four of Cups. I notice the waning moon behind her, and think part of how I block change is to do with not wanting to let go of things, even if they aren't what I want. That old "better the Devil you know" thing...

The woman looks almost like a mermaid, with her dress trailing into the water as she contemplates a lotus blossom in a cup. I take this as saying that I block change by getting trapped in self-reflection rather than action.

3) What is my windmill? Arwen describes this as our most adaptable, creative self...

This is a lovely version of the Seven of Wands, full of dynamism and action. A man sits astride a dragon, with a shield protecting him. He wields a crystal-topped wand against the onslaught of six more fiery wands. I notice the rock the man and the dragon use as a high point, and the way its shape echoes the Ace of Swords.

My most adaptable self, then, is effervescent and willing to fight for ideas. In terms of my dissertation, this makes me think of a willingness to present my case with passion and determination. The dragon also speaks of relying on the wisdom of others, perhaps through reading up on a subject, as well as potentially with my dissertation advisor, once one is appointed.

In other areas of life, too, bringing a bit more vigour and enthusiasm certainly seems like an antidote to the passivity reflected in the Four of Cups. I guess one of the issues I see is that it's hard to be enthusiastic unless it's for something I care about. And that brings me full circle to the Ace of Swords: I need something new in my life, an idea that I care about and will work for.

Well, it will be interesting to see how 2012 goes. I will try to remember to focus on what I can do, rather than over-thinking things. How about you, what do you hope for from the year to come?

Family

2011-12-30T06:00:00.077Z

What a beautiful way to end this week with the Crystal Visions Tarot!

Here we have a woman sitting in the crook of a tree, with a wolf beside her and a deer to one side and a little behind her. There are also female figures carved into or growing out of the two branches that rise to either side of the main figures in the tree crook. By the roots of the tree, clear crystals sprout from the ground like flowers. Ten pentacles decorate the tree, six below where the woman and wolf sit, four more to the side and above them. The pentacles are golden disks with large crystals of varying hues in the centre and six smaller crystals surrounding them. In the background, a beautiful castle with high turrets is bathed in a radiant light.

Instead of a traditional family, as seen in the RWS version of this card, here the family is one of the woman's own making: the wolf who leans against her and the deer who gazes up at the two of them, unable to climb the tree. Although they may not be all the same, they share a bond of friendship that runs deep and true - a family of the spirit, rather than of blood. The wisdom of ancestors, often depicted by a grandfatherly figure, here takes the form of the wood sprites looking down from the branches that hold the woman and wolf.

The castle in the background makes me think of the importance of appreciating our home, and making it feel as beautiful and inviting as possible. I've done quite a bit of that this week: reorganising all my tarot decks into alphabetical order, organising my oracles by genre, doing a big clean on the house and loads of laundry ready for Big Boy to start nursery again next week.

After yesterday's card, this image also makes me think about the character traits I've inherited from my father. For several years he worked as a journalist on Fleet Street and although this blog is in no way of that calibre, writing it is a connection between us. I think he would have approved, had he ever read it, even though he wasn't into tarot. Still, he loved to write, and he loved imagery, both literary and visual.

I am grateful for the joy in writing I have inherited from my father.

My Top Ten of 2011

2011-12-29T17:00:00.007Z

From Emily Carding's Tarot of the Sidhe

Reading about the PECTO Awards, I started thinking about which decks would be on my personal Top Ten for this year, and which I'm most looking forward to for next year. So, this is my totally personal opinion, in alphabetical order, and mixing tarot and oracle decks, of my favourite decks released this year:

Cat's Eye Tarot - In my eyes, the best cat tarot going (and I have several) as it really is from the cats' perspective, drawn by a vet - 'nuff said.
Crystal Visions Tarot - A soft, feminine deck with beautiful artwork, traditional RWS but with some nice twists.
Joie de Vivre Tarot - Quirky, and a bit less busy than the Paulina, with lovely colours and a playful air.
Journey Oracle - Another feminine deck, but with a hint of Steampunk and plenty of attitude :)
Gaian Tarot - I love the artwork and the nature- and community-based ethos - an intelligent and thoughtful deck.
Oracle of the Shapeshifters - Incredibly cute images, but with some real depth.
Tarot of the Sidhe - Emily's art is stunning, and I love the pagan spirituality it embodies, as well as the sense of magical, spiritual exploration.
Tarot of the Silicon Dawn - This deck is just completely innovative and out there - nothing else like it on the market!
Wheel of the Year Tarot - This choice may surprise many, as it isn't a deck that has gotten much attention. I love the pagan symbolism and the cartoon-like artwork. It just speaks to me.
Wildwood Tarot - A very different, nature-based deck with stunning artwork by Will Worthington. The proud successor of the Greenwood, I far prefer its more realistic imagery, while the depth of scientific and environmental thought remains.

Most anticipated decks for 2012:

Alice Tarot
Gilded Tarot Royale
Steampunk Tarot

I'd love to hear what your favourite decks have been this year, and why. And which ones you're looking forward to most next year...

Life is Changed

2011-12-29T06:00:00.035Z

The Crystal Visions Tarot continues to show a gentle face, today, despite this being a "challenging" card.

In this version of Death the inscription reads "Vita mutatur non tollitur" which translates as "Life is changed, not taken away". This message of transformation is emphasised by the butterflies gliding up on beams of light, and the very angelic Death figure holding an ankh, symbol of eternal life. A woman's form seems to blend into the rock on which she lies, making us question whether she is a corpse or a stone effigy. In either case, she seems to be becoming a part of her surroundings.

Nevertheless, even a change may lead us to grieve. Knowing that we will never be the same again, or experience the same things or see a particular person, are still reasons to mourn even if the change has positive elements, too. The angel reminds of this, with downcast head covered and hand held out in blessing. The angel says goodbye and acknowledges the sadness of this transition.

For me, this card is a reminder that today my Dear One and I have to go and sign some papers regarding my father's estate. Although he died nearly two years ago, these bureaucratic reminders still pop up from time to time. Wherever he is now, even if he is just food for worms, is better than where he was the last few years of his life. His soul gave up on living long before his body caught on.

I am grateful for the reminder to life life to the full while I can.

Getting Your Feet Wet

2011-12-28T07:00:00.014Z

Today, the Crystal Visions Tarot offers an interesting take on the King of Cups.

I like the fact that he is sat on a boulder by a pool, instead of on a throne. Still, he has plenty of insignia of his rank - a trident wand, a trident crown, a golden cup, a huge red crystal over his sternum, gold armbands around his upper arms, and a gold necklace at his throat. Behind him, a full moon shines between overhanging foliage, while in front of him is the pond. One foot rests on a rock in the pool, the other foot resting in the water. Lotus flowers bloom in the pool in front of him, and reeds sway behind him.

The symbolism feels quite different to traditional versions of this King. For one thing, the water around him is calm and still. For another, it is just a pool, rather than the churning ocean. And then there's the fact that, rather than sitting on a plinth out of the water, he is actually getting one foot wet. These things suggest to me that this King is willing to allow himself to experience his emotions while still keeping a sense of perspective. He is in control, but not by holding himself rigidly. Years of practising inner calm and mindfulness mean that he knows and is undaunted by his emotions, and is able to tune in to his intuition.

Today we are interviewing someone for a job, and this feels like a good card for it. I need to trust my intuition, be empathic, but also keep a sense of objectivity. I'm sure those are good traits to cultivate more generally, too. Perhaps today would be a good day for doing some tarot readings...

I am grateful for days when I don't feel overwhelmed by emotion.

Ruby Wand

2011-12-27T07:00:00.001Z

I am delighted by the vibrant, passionate colours of the Crystal Visions Tarot. Today, these are show-cased in the Ace of Wands.

A cute little pink dragon twines around a ruby-encrusted wand, with a crimson sky in the background, and pink flowers growing around it. A couple of bubbles float near the base of the wand, and the huge ruby at its tip shines brightly.

I get a real sense of passion, power and potential from this card. There is nothing heavy-handed here, nothing bullying or forceful, despite being powerful. The dragon is fiery, yet with beautiful translucent wings. And the flowers and delicate bubbles suggest this is not an enthusiasm and fire that will destroy, but rather that have creative potential, with an emphasis on the aesthetically pleasing.

I'm not particularly artistic, so I don't see in this a call to paint or sketch, to sculpt or knit or sew. Based on this card, today seems like a good day to make a start on some presentation materials I want to create for a workshop on "Getting to Know the Tarot Court". I've already sketched out the ideas in note form, but now its time to get inspired and put in visuals and text, as well as putting together handouts. Fun!

I am grateful for the passion to create, in whatever form.

Perspectives on Strength

2011-12-26T07:00:00.057Z

Today, the Crystal Visions Tarot offers us another card from the Major Arcana.

There are many traditional elements in this Strength card: from the main characters being a woman and a lion to the lemniscate (infinity symbol) which graces the crystal-topped wand the woman holds, to the way her hand rests on the lion's jaw. Yet the wand itself is something different, as are the eagles that fly above and the sunflowers around them, as well as the fact that woman and lion sit on a rocky plinth.

To me, this card suggests that part of inner strength comes from being able to get perspective on a situation (the eagles), as well as being able to control our inner urges and use their energy in a productive way, without self-recriminations (the woman gently controlling the lion). There is also a suggestion of the power of intent and will in finding our inner strength (the wand), and a potential for growth through illumination (the sunflowers) if we manage this act of taming our more brutish aspects.

Today, I need to control my sloth and my greed. I am reading another novel (Bewitched and Betrayed, by Lisa Shearin), but also have some work I need to get done quite urgently. I also want to reorganise my tarot cabinet this holiday, putting my decks in alphabetical order. At the moment they are rather higgledy piggledy in a semi-logical favourite to least favourite order, which really doesn't work as I tend to change my mind about how much I like a deck when I use it again, anyway :)

Also, on Christmas Eve I gave in and ate some turrón we had been given as a gift by a Spanish friend. While almonds are pretty healthy, all the processed sugar certainly isn't, and yesterday I noticed that I was jonesing for sweets - and they try to kid us that sugar isn't addictive! So, I need to steer clear of the stuff until the cravings die down again.

I am grateful for the support of spirit in controlling my base urges.

Fairy Queen

2011-12-25T08:00:00.003Z

On this Christmas morning, the Crystal Visions Tarot offers us a Fairy Queen, the Queen of Swords.

I love this version of the Queen of Swords! Probably because I often associate myself with the Queen of Swords, being a double Gemini woman. And some versions show her as a bitter, old harridan, which of course she can be: with a sharp wit and sharper tongue, and not being one to suffer fools gladly. However, on the more positive side we see here her potential for transformation, for following ideas as they lead her towards brighter paths, and her willingness to leave behind pain and allow her spirit to soar on the breath of life. Having experienced some of the pain of life, we can allow it to turn us sour or we can allow it to open our hearts to ourselves and others. In this I see the shadow and the light side of the Queen of Swords.

Today we have a very mellow day planned. Eating left-overs from yesterday, going for a walk on the local heath, playing with Big Boy's new toys. I'm also hoping for some time to read and, if I'm lucky, write up a tarot reading for a querent. I guess where I see the Queen of Swords energy is in the fact I may have to do some moderating between Big Boy and his dad, and perhaps in myself letting go of some of the pain of this year to be able to just enjoy where we are now...

Wishing those who celebrate today a wonderful, happy, festive time with loved ones!

I am grateful for all I have learned this year, and for the ability to empathise that suffering can bring.

To Fly Beyond the Sunset

2011-12-24T06:00:00.039Z

For this Christmas week I decided to use the recently released Crystal Visions Tarot (U.S.Games, 2011) by Jessica Galasso.

What a lovely way to start, with this beautiful version of the Fool. When I looked at it today, it brought the phrase "To fly beyond the sunset" to mind. I was sure it came from something, and when I googled it I realised my mistake - I was thinking of To Sail Beyond the Sunset. Anyhow, Galasso's Fool looks like she is about to take flight and join the flock of butterfulies that flit around her. One foot is already stepping off the rocky ledge on which she stands, wrapped around with a ribbon, while other ribbons fly in her hair and from her clothes. Will these transform into butterfly wings as she transitions to the air? Or will the butterflies take hold of the ribbons to bear her upward? Or is she stepping off, to plunge into the pool below her? It feels as though, one way or the other, a change is coming, something that will start her on a new path.

I see here a willingness to be open to new possibilities and opportunities, to not pre-judge what we see or hear. The Fool often brings Beginner's Mind to a situation, an openness to experience and a lack of preconceptions. In itself, this can be transformative, allowing us to see a situation from a wholy different perspective. It makes me think that this is more about sunrise than sunset - the dawning of a new day, with all the possibilities that offers.

In much of Europe, Christmas is actually celebrated on Christmas Eve, just as New Year is celebrated on New Year's Eve. Having European roots, that is my practice, too, and one which my Dear One has been happy to adopt. So, today my parents come to celebrate with us, to light candles and feast together and give gifts. None of us is Christian, it is more about tradition and family. I sometimes wonder about swapping around to celebrating on the 21st, but we haven't done so yet...

Perhaps some of the ideas and gifts we share today will open up new potentials in one way or another. Or maybe this is simply advice to bring an innocent sense of joy to the whole day - never a bad suggestion :)

I am grateful for the infinite possibilities of life.

As Light As A Feather

2011-12-23T06:00:00.048Z

For my final draw with the Cat's Eye Tarot, the Ace of Swords has come out to play.

In this deck, all the Aces show a cat's paw reaching out to a symbol of the suit's element. Here, a dainty siamese paw stretches to catch a loose feather from a white cockatoo. The cockatoo looks on from its window-side perch with some trepidation.

A feather, like an idea, can be hard to get ahold of: it can easily float away, eluding our grasp. Likewise, our words often tumble about, skittering here and there despite our best intentions. And the truth, well, does it even exist as a single thing? Or, like a feather, is it made up of many other smaller bits? And, if looked at in one light it may seem one way, while if seen from another direction it may take on a totally different?

Words and ideas aren't always innocent, either. Even if they are not ill-intentioned, someone else may see them that way, just as the cockatoo here may see the cat's playful batting of a floating feather as a potential threat.

Several months ago, I alienated someone I like and respect through ill-chosen words. Now, I may have the chance to put that right. However, it's a delicate situation, and this card reminds me that I need a light touch. I hope, though, that this card heralds that opportunity, and see it advising me to reach out.

I am grateful for the encouragement to try to right a wrong.

Calm Alertness

2011-12-22T07:00:00.041Z

The Cat's Eye Tarot is certainly giving us the opportunity to look at quite a few Court cards, which many find the hardest to read in any deck. Good practice, then :)

A young male tabby cat lies in the grass, looking relaxed but alert. He isn't ready to pounce or swipe, to hunt or chase, to prowl or stalk. In fact, he doesn't look like he's doing much of anything except enjoying the day, the soft grass under him, and the entertainment offered by watching life go by. A far less dynamic energy than the other Knights, then, but still very aware and engaged. He is on the ground, representing the Pentacles connection to the element of earth, and his colouring shows this, too. He may not be about to leap into action, yet there is a feeling of preparation here. He's not just taking it easy, but looks like he's checking out the situation so that when he does decide to act he'll have everything under control.

This the kind of methodicalness I associate with the Knight of Pentacles. He's not the romantic type to sweep you off your feet like the Knight of Cups, nor the charming, passionate firecracker who leaps in feet first like the Knight of Wands, nor the hot-headed, intelligent and scheming Swords Knight. He's more of the "slow but steady wins the race" type, who may not seem as exciting as the others, but who still has a lot to recommend him. Determined, loyal and methodical, he is likely to achieve what he sets out to do, and is a good friend to have.

There are a couple of things today where I could do with some of this energy, which is not one that necessarily comes easily to me. I still have some Christmas shopping to do (eek), which I need to buckle down to. And this afternoon Big Boy has another doctor's appointment. It's not one where I expect anything much, more of a checking on how things have been going type of thing. We have to keep plodding on with these appointments as they rule out one issue or another, try out one medicine or another, consider one procedure or another. Lots of variables, and so I don't expect any results or answers. Still, it sometimes feels like a waste of time. So, I have to remind myself that it's part of a process that we just have to get through - determination and steadfastness, very Knight of Pentacles.

I am grateful for the reminder to keep my focus on long term goals.

Homebody

2011-12-21T06:00:00.029Z

I have to say, the Emperor is not normally a card I'm very keen on. All that structure and sense of knowing what he wants and how to get it. I often see Emperor energy as a bit domineering, though I acknowledge the positives to order and building something lasting. The Cat's Eye Tarot has a rather cute take on this archetype, yet I still see the same fundamental energy here.

A regal-looking fluffy black-and-white cat sits on a chair by the hearth. He turns to look down at a ginger kitten trying to scale the chair. It's funny, at different times I get disparate feelings from this card. Sometimes, it seems the Emperor is looking down at this young upstart, saying, "Don't you know your place?" As though the Emperor has a very clear idea of what he considers right and wrong, and who should do what and when, and this little kitten hasn't gotten the memo! Other times, I see him as a more benevolent Emperor - this little kitten is learning the ropes, and that's something the Emperor is happy to help teach. "A cat's place is on a comfy chair by the fire." I hear him saying to Ginger.

Today, my in-laws are coming to celebrate Christmas with us. I see two things with this card, therefore. Firstly, there is my Dear One getting everything ready for his parents, making sure it is all just so. Secondly, there is Big Boy, who will get thoroughly spoiled and have his every whim catered to. I have been getting the Emperor for him since before he was born, and as a little Cappie he does have clear ideas about what he wants, and plenty of methods of showing his displeasure when it doesn't happen. So, perhaps it's also about the energy I need to bring to put some boundaries on him...

I am grateful for routines and habits which make life with Big Boy easier to manage.

Abandonment

2011-12-20T06:00:00.026Z

The Cat's Eye Tarot doesn't pull its punches with today's card!

Left on a pier, with a cage and an "Alley Cat" bowl, this black-and-white charmer's luck seems to have run out. A woman walks away, taking another cat with her. Who will the remaining cat miss more, the human or the other cat? And what were they to one another - siblings, parent and child, friends, lovers? The cat's pose speaks of despondency and mourning. Does the cat left behind live on the houseboat with the woman's ex? Does this mark the end of more than one relationship? If that's the case, I guess the equivalent of the ignored upright cups in more traditional versions of this card might be the fact that the cat and the houseboat owner still have each other...

Today my Dear One and I are going to the cinema and then out for a meal, just the two of us. I feel a bit bad leaving Big Boy behind. Still, on Sunday we took him to the cinema and only got to watch half of "Puss in Boots" because he decided he was bored. No idea why, as we thought it was brilliant, and plan to get the DVD as soon as it comes out to see the rest. Anyhow, I see Big Boy in this card, feeling left behind and left out. Hopefully, that's not really the case. He'll be with someone he knows and loves. Maybe he'll have more fun than us... Though we're going to see Sherlock Holmes: action and humour, with a tarot reader as well as Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law - pretty close to perfect in my eyes!

I am grateful for excellent people to help take care of Big Boy.

Cattitude

2011-12-19T06:00:00.040Z

Another Swords Court card wants to have its say today. The Knight of Swords from the Cat's Eye Tarot is full of attitude.

An elegant siamese, his mouth is open to hiss or yowl at whatever poor unfortunate has aroused his wrath. At any moment he might turn and pounce, or just take a swipe with a seemingly dainty paw that hides strong, sharp claws. Woe betide any bird who comes to taunt him, for he is agile and fast, willing to take risks in pursuit of his goal. He won't just defend his territory, but is also quick to go on the offence. He stands on a wooden deck, with a view out over the surrounding landscape - a good vantage point.

I have several situations today where I need to be diplomatic. So, for me, I think this card is actually about what to beware of. I can sometimes slip into this kind of energy, but that's not always very productive. Rather than snapping at someone, or expecting them to have the necessary information and be able to apply it quickly and effectively, I shall try to be calm and patient, to communicate clearly yet gently.

I am grateful that I can choose not to express all my thoughts and criticisms. I am grateful for the reminder to think and express myself positively.

Himalayan Wisdom

2011-12-18T06:00:00.026Z

There are very few human's in the Cat's Eye Tarot, and all the Court cards are represented by different cats. Today we meet the King of Swords.

This Himalayan tom looks out at us with wise eyes. He's big and fluffy, but that doesn't diminish his experience and intelligence. Coming originally from the mountain range between India and China, home of the Dalai Lama, these cats have many strengths. What I see here is an ability to survive hardship, a deep spiritual connection, an open mind, and ultimately a willingness to make tough decisions. His eyes are blue, colour of communication. The way he stands in the cat flap, neither out nor in, speaks of being able to see different perspectives. It also suggests a willingness to defend a point of view, and that ultimately he can and will choose. He has a certain gravitas, too, I think.

Perhaps I can use his power of discernment and decisiveness to help with my Christmas shopping. I've got most of it done, all the no-brainers, which leaves the tough decisions: finding just the right thing for those hard-to-buy-for people. I guess that doesn't fit very well with the idea of Himalayan wisdom, though - Christmas shopping certainly goes against the idea of non-attachment. Yet taking time to express our love and keeping-in-mind of others are not bad things.

I am grateful for the internet, a great tool for researching gifts, on top of all its other benefits :)

The Call of the Wild

2011-12-17T06:00:00.007Z

This week I will be drawing from the recently released Cat's Eye Tarot (U.S. Games, 2011). I've been waiting impatiently for this deck since I first saw images of it on Aeclectic back in 2006! It's been a long time coming, but definitely worth the wait :) And I was fortunate enough to join a group order through TABI, so we got the deck for a very good price - another perk of this lovely organisation.

So, for this first draw we meet the Lovers. Two beautiful, fluffy tabby cats sit cosily together indoors. However, the tom has his eye on a cute little black cat outside.

All about choices, then! Do we choose love, even if it sometimes involves mundane and run-of-the-mill everyday stuff? Or do we choose passion and adventure? Of course, this isn't just about relationships. It might be that we face a choice between playing it safe in a job we know, or taking a risk with a career change, or just a new employer. Or maybe we need to choose between sticking to a diet we know or radically changing the way we eat.

For me, today my choice seems to be between doing what I know I should do - Christmas shopping, writing and posting Christmas cards, wrapping presents - and what I'd like to do - finish my book! I think today the call of duty is stronger, but I may manage a chapter or two ;)

I am grateful for the reminder that there are many kinds of love in this world - love for our near and dear ones, love for ourselves, love for cats and tarot decks :D

Path of Learning

2011-12-16T06:00:00.029Z

For this final draw with the Whispering Tarot, I received the Hermit.

Once again, this deck offers a slight twist on the traditional RWS interpretation of this archetype. Here, we see a young person standing on a path that passes into a tunnel leading up a mountain. He wears a red tunic, colour of passion, and a green hood, colour of growth. Inside the passage is a lamp, already lit, waiting to be picked up. And above, on a high ledge, we see an older Hermit dressed in the purple of wisdom, who has already reached the summit on this path to learning.

I like this reminder that we all have to start somewhere when we want to learn something new, or go deeper in our studies. The fact that we don't know much should never stop us from making a start. It also suggests that the path is not always easy, it may be dark and steep - we may feel confused and that it is hard work. Yet the outcome is a new perspective on life, a better understanding of ourselves and the world.

Today, for me, I see this card being more about the retreating aspect of the Hermit. I plan to spend the day at home, wrapping Christmas presents, shopping on-line, and hopefully making time to read a novel - my third this year! I used to read two a week, but Big Boy and my studies put paid to that. So, a treat - some time to read and feel decadent. My choice today: Karen Chance's Death's Mistress :)

I am grateful for a bit of peace and quiet, and a chance to read without needing it to be about deep learning. That's part of the path, too!

Winds of Change

2011-12-15T06:00:00.054Z

Today, the Whispering Tarot offers us a chance at renewal.

The eponymous Tower here is actually a three part building, sitting on a little island. Fierce waves rise up all about, as though trying to reach the building and suck it in, their power shown by the shipwreck in the background. Air elementals blow fiercely at the Tower, and a bolt of lightning strikes the highest roof. Despite the onslaught and desolation, the Tower still seems to stand tall, though there is a fire burning inside the section where the lightning struck.

My sense here is of a situation where there is outward calm in the face of difficulties. Yet there is transformation going on internally, a reaction to the circumstances which cannot be fought or denied. Old patterns and structures will eventually have to give way, but something new will be forged in the process. And perhaps not the whole structure needs to go, though still the largest part of it.

This feels in some ways quite a positive version of the Tower, though still challenging. Although it isn't my favourite card in the tarot, it's one I seem to have a close relationship with :( I wondered if this was just my paranoia speaking, but when I went in and checked, it is the Major I have blogged about most often, and all of those posts were as a randomly drawn card. The next closest card is the Hight Priestess, and several of her posts are ones I chose, rather than them choosing me!

I have had the Tower popping up rather a lot since I was first pregnant with Big Boy. And I guess having a child is always a challenge to our established sense of self and lifestyle, the way we do things and what we do. From the small things, like the fact I used to always just travel with hand luggage, and now heft around a huge amount of stuff (how can someone so small require so much?) to the bigger things, they all play into our sense of self.

So, what does this mean for me today? I wonder whether I will have an insight into what these changes to my sense of self mean, and where I am now compared to four years ago...

I am grateful for the forging of a new self, however hard it may at times feel.

Sagittarian Birthday

2011-12-14T06:00:00.005Z

Another chance to think about strong, active energy in our lives today, with the King of Wands from Liz Hazel's Whispering Tarot.

This King holds an orb-topped sceptre, an instrument to manifest his will, and which shows a certain foresight. A green and yellow dragon with white wings wraps around him, symbol of life energy and swift decisiveness. His robe is red with a purple pattern, indicating his passionate aliveness tempered with wisdom. His belt is blue, suggesting he talks from his gut - with conviction.

For me, today, this card is about my Dear One. He is a fiery Sagittarian and today is his birthday. Although I don't think this is his official birth card, according to the Golden Dawn attributions, I still think it fits him well. He can be quite absolutist, and determined, believing strongly in things. However, these days he is learning to soften a little, helped by meditation which is bringing him a bit more calm. He is also passionate about the people in his life. Today is Big Boy's school Christmas Carol show, and we're going to that, rather than doing something more particularly for my Dear One (though we will go out for a meal, just the two of us, later).

I am grateful for the chance to love and be loved by a good man.

Swift Flight

2011-12-13T06:00:00.024Z

Finally we break the spell of emotion, moving out of three days of Cups cards. The Whispering Tarot offers up the 8 of Wands today, with warmth and movement aplenty.

Two people, one in pink, one in blue, fly on the back of a white-winged dragon, with a blue crest and brown body. Above them the sun shines as though it were a whirlpool of light. Below, eight trees stand in the foreground of a valley, through which a river runs, bridged near a small town. In the background, purple and lilac mountains dominate the skyline.

I have the sense that this movement could take us anywhere - to the mountains, symbols of wisdom and truth. To the town, symbol of community. To the trees, symbols of nature and growth. Or to the sun itself, symbol of warmth and energy. There is enormous potential here, if we can but harness and direct it.

Yesterday I spoke to my dissertation tutor, and finally hammered out a question to examine, as well as defining my research methodology. So, now to get a move on and start work on the protocol, while I have energy and enthusiasm. Today I want to at least start reading one of the books I know I'll need. Though I do intend to take a break later this week and kick back, but I'll see when the time is right for that :)

I am grateful for a sense of energy and purpose.

Rachel Pollack's God/dess Spread

2011-12-12T17:00:00.052Z

Recently, I bought Rachel Pollack's latest book "Soul Forest: Twenty Four Tarot Writings". Having a quick skim through (before my essay was done) one thing that caught my eye was her chapter on a Goddess Spread she came up with in the process of teaching a class. The idea was to start by writing your associations of Goddesses (or Gods) to the Majors of the tarot. Then, she suggested separating the deck into Majors, Courts, and Pips. The positions are:

1 - Major - What Goddess or God is important to me now?
2+3 - Courts - Who have I been in my life? Who will this God/dess help me become in this life?
4,5,6 - Pips - What task do I face? How will this God/dess help me? How does the God/dess want me to honor him/her?

I decided to tweak this slightly, by using a Goddess Tarot deck with specific Goddesses already allocated to the Majors. I can think of at least three of these: Kris Waldherr's Goddess Tarot, Lo Scarabeo's Universal Goddess Tarot, and my personal favourite - Sage Halloway and Katherine Skaggs' Mythical Goddess Tarot, which is the one I used for this reading. In terms of tweaking the spread, I also saw this reading more in terms of now rather than my life as a whole.

The Goddess I received was the bawdy, sensual, spontaneous and funny Uzume (who I wrote about here), associated with the Fool. My two Court cards were 2) who have I been - the Crone of Seas (Cups): resurrection and 3) who will this Goddess help me become - the Child of Wind (Swords): consciousness. The minors I drew were 4) task - 8 of Fire (Wands), 5) how this Goddess will help - 8 of Seas (Cups), and 6) how does this Goddess want me to honour her - 7 of Fire.

How to interpret this? I see the Crone of the Seas saying I have recently been feeling very tired and old, in need of some transformation and healing. A bit of emotional overwhelm there, and a desire for female wisdom to help me in this moment - hence my desire to connect more with the Goddess, which I mentioned a few weeks ago. As for who I can become, the Child of Wind seems about as far as you can get from this. Playful, energetic, delighting in communication and movement, listening to the messages of spirit and getting a completely new perspective, she flies on a dragonfly, fearless and enthusiastic. I can definitely see how Uzume, with her suggestion of playfulness, bravery and spontaneity is an appropriate choice to help me reach this state.

As for how to go about it, I'll admit at first the 8 of Seas as how the Goddes would help me left me a little flummoxed. However, just today Rachel posted on how to transform problem cards, which helped give me a different perspective. So, the 8 of Fire says my task is to be able to express myself and my creativity from a place of love. How the Goddess will help me is that in a difficult situation she will diffuse high-running emotions with her laughter and spontaneity, depleting them of their power to overwhelm. How I can honour her is by finding my own inner fire and passion, a sense of courage and a willingness to show myself to, and share myself with, others.

I think this is a lovely spread, and I shall ponder these cards for a while. I sense there's much more still there to explore. If you give it a go, do let me know how it turns out...

Borne Along By Emotion

2011-12-12T06:00:00.028Z

Today's card from the Whispering Tarot is another Court card, the King of Cups.

In contrast to yesterday's Queen, this chap isn't even getting a toe wet. Borne along by undine's this King travels safely in his boat. Two swans fan their wings behind him - perhaps part of the boat, perhaps real birds. On his head, a shell-like crown, and in his raised left hand a golden cup. His clothes are green, with a yellow over-tunic.

This feels like a good depiction of the King of Cups: he controls sentiment rather than being controlled by it. He hears the call of emotion, but can rise above it. He is guided by it, without being overwhelmed.

Today I hope for a mellow day with my Dear One and my brother, with Big Boy at school. We plan a long walk, and a curry in the evening. Perhaps this card is to do with spending time with my brother. He's going through a lot of soul-searching at the moment. I hope I can stay calm and balanced in the face of his uncertainty, helping rather than aggravating things. Perhaps, too, I need to guard my emotions - he's in a delicate enough place without having to deal with my stuff.

I am grateful for moments of equanimity.

Floating in Emotion

2011-12-11T06:00:00.011Z

The Queen of Cups from Liz Hazel's Whispering Tarot floats into view today.

This watery queen wears a five pronged crown on her head, with a flower tucked behind her left ear and a dangling earring hanging from her right. In her right hand she holds a golden cup, in the other a white orb, while behind her a full moon glows, shedding light across the ripples of the water surrounding our queen. Two swans can be seen behind her, symbols of beauty, love and defence, while lotus pads, one with a frog, one with a bud and one with a blossom, float in front of her. She looks completely in her element, her shoulders and head emerging from the water, with no land in sight.

What a positive version of the Queen of Cups! I see here symbolism of magic and intuition, spiritual growth and enlightenment, beauty and passion, romance and strength. She seems to suggest that swimming in the realm of emotions can be a powerful learning experience, rather than leading to emotionality or wishy-washiness.

I am delighted to have finished the final essay for my Masters - yay me! Two days early, to boot. Anyhow, what it means is that I can spend today on more Queen of Cups-like pursuits: time with Big Boy and my parents, who are coming for a visit; and time to work on a couple of bigger readings I've had in mind for a week or two... :D

I am grateful for the time to tap into my intuition, and enjoy emotional well-being.

Mermaids

2011-12-10T06:00:00.020Z

This week I will be drawing from a little self-published gem, by Liz Hazel of Tarot Decoded fame. The Whispering Tarot is a delightful deck, with mystical creatures and magic galore, yet without falling into excess or triteness.

For this first draw I pulled the Nine of Cups. Two mermaids sit together, back to back, while another stands behind them. They each hold aloft a cup, and six more cups surround them, overflowing with water. Five little fish jump playfully from one cup to another. The mermaids look entirely happy and in their element, enjoying each others' company and the play of the sea creatures around them. Emotional fulfillment and joy!

Well, I certainly hope this proves the case for me today. The first draft of my essay is complete, but now I need to go over it, editing it and making sure it hangs together. Just like the cups in this image, there are a number of elements, but they all need to connect up in an emotionally satisfying way, rather then feeling like a bunch of disparate bits. In between times, I hope to have some fun with Big Boy, and spend a nice evening with my Dear One and my brother. Not a bad plan for the day :)

I am grateful for moments of emotional fulfillment.

Resilience

2011-12-09T06:00:00.015Z

The Journey Oracle offers us a really cheerful and evocative image today. I'm often not a big fan of "landscapes" on their own in oracle or tarot decks, but this is definitely an exception to that.

Titled "Resilience", this card makes me think of something Carl Rogers wrote. He talked about aspects that others see as negative, even pathological, actually just being the best way we can find in the circumstances to cope and survive. He likened this to a potato in a dark cellar sprouting anyway and sending up a weedy, white shoot, seeking the light. While this looks deformed compared to a healthy plant, it's just the potato doing the best it can. Likewise, here we see a tree that has been chopped down. Still, a new shoot springs forth, life continuing despite the challenges. And the little bird at the top of the branch suggests the possibility of getting perspective and being lifted up from these hard times. Being the blue of communication, it feels even more strongly suggestive of the messages of spirit with which birds are, in any case, often associated. If we can listen to spirit, we will find growth potential in the face of adversity.

I hope this is a message I can put across to my clients today. One is very willing to hear messages from spirit - she has been talking about going to see a medium. The other says she doesn't believe in anything, and yet she adores birds, and will always stop and listen to their song. Both in their own way are opening to spirit.

As for me, one of my brothers is over for a visit. I think he may need a reminder, too, that he is doing the best he can in his circumstances. Hopefully, big sis can find a way to say that without sounding patronising. And perhaps, when I say it to others, my soul can hear it, as well.

I am grateful for the potential for growth that is always there in life, if we can but open ourselves to it.

Beauty

2011-12-08T06:00:00.026Z

While the colours are girly, and the sentiments are fairly New Age/Spiritual, some of the cards of the Journey Oracle are quite challenging, and open to multiple interpretations. At least, I find that the case with today's card.

Like the bionic woman, with a mechanical eye and arm, this Beauty has been altered, improved? Some might see her as being ugly and deformed, but others would see her as stronger, more able, gifted even. I note, too, her clothes, which seem to be made of metal - armour to protect her, or another sign of things that are unnatural?

While the companion book talks of appreciating our own inner beauty, I am left with the question of whether she chose these changes, or whether they were imposed on her. Either way, appreciating our inner core is clearly relevant, but how easy or hard that is may vary greatly.

Today I go to Big Boy's Annual Care Plan Review. All the staff and therapists who work with him will be there, and we discuss how he's doing and what provisions need to be put in place for him for the year to come, to help him make the most of education and life. This includes talking about the various pieces of equipment he uses, and what other things he may need, both at school and at home. I am reminded by this card not to let all the technicalities stop me from seeing him for himself, a small boy with a ready smile.

I am grateful for the technology that helps improve our lives, and for the reminder that we are more than that alone.

The Fragile Thread

2011-12-07T06:00:00.052Z

The Journey Oracle offers us another beautiful card today, with an air of sadness to it. Though it's still far more cheerful than yesterday's card!

The Fragile Thread shows a woman holding a heart on a string, the heart pierced by a small hole in one side. The woman's clothes are seductive, softly flowing, a combination of blue and green, with a red ribbon. Stars seem to spring from her cheek, floating away in the air like a trail that would lead someone to her. All in all, it feels to me like she is someone who is offering herself, seductive and enchanting.

This card reminds me of the risks we run when we offer ourselves to others. The risk of being hurt, taken for granted, or rejected. And a heart really isn't a toy to be given away to win another's approval. It reminds me of a Dory Previn song my mum used to listen to when I was little called "I Dance and Dance and Smile and Smile". OK, the title isn't exactly catchy, but it still resonates with me - a song about loving too much, trying too hard to please.

That's what I see in this card today, someone who doesn't see what a wonderful child of the stars they are. And so she offers her heart on a fragile thread, trying to win something that she already deserves, if she could only trust in her loveableness.

Today, this card makes me wonder who I might be trying to please by completing my essay, finishing my Masters, working as a counsellor... Big Boy has been ill again for the past couple of days, and I'm exhausted, yet I also feel this push: I must do it! And suddenly Alanis Morissette's "Perfect" echoes in my ears.

I notice that both the songs that came to me were about parents, and I guess that's often the root of these feelings. Not that I'm blaming my parents, far from it. My mum has always been very supportive of everything I do. And yet, I still remember any small instance when I didn't feel supported by her. So, how much is that to do with me, rather than her?

I am grateful for times when I can love myself and respect my own needs.

Giveaway Results

2011-12-06T08:00:00.000Z

So, lovely people, thanks to those of you who took part in my Yule Yoga Giveaway. I decided that, as it is the season for giving, and as it was a Double Y giveaway, I'd double it up for U, too :) So, the two lucky winners, as selected by random.org, are:

First, Jema/Saidenne - congratulations!

Second, Monica of Tarot in a Teacup - woohoo!

I shall contact you both on your websites, but if you spot this first, please do email me at info(at)innerwhispers.co.uk with your postal addresses so I can get your parcels out to you :)

Wishing everyone a lovely Yuletide!

Torn

2011-12-06T06:00:00.045Z

This card from the Journey Oracle (Schiffer, 2011) reminds me of the Three of Swords. It even looks similar to that card from Emily Carding's Tarot of the Sidhe, in a much more girly way.

Still, the feeling here certainly isn't girly! Talk about having the heart ripped out of you, being all cut up, feeling empty! Unsurprisingly, it makes me think of the Natalie Imgruglia song of the same name.

In the moment, this is one of the worst feelings in the world. Yet I have always felt that the Three of Swords has a positive side, too, and the same goes here. Living through this, working through the pain and rebuilding your sense of self, is hard. Once you've achieved it, though, you're stronger for it. It makes me think of Joanna Powell-Colbert's recent post on being a member of the Scar Clan... I think many of us can empathise with that title.

Sometimes, though, we don't manage to work through it all, and are left feeling vulnerable. We might create a false armour to protect ourselves from the outside, rather than re-growing a strong centre from the inside. That kind of armour protects us, but also locks others out. And it can crumble unexpectedly.

Today I see one of my clients. Although he acts all tough and macho, this is how he's feeling on the inside. Hopefully, by exploring his emotions and building some new strategies for coping, he will in time heal his wounds.

Likewise, I still have some tender spots of my own. I think overall I'm stronger for them, but certainly changed. I used to wonder at people who cried at the movies: "It's only a film!" Now, I sob my heart out. It still feels weird, I don't even understand why. But I am coming to accept that this is part of the new me. What I used to see as weakness may just be that my emotions are more accessible, that I empathise more with others' pain.

I am grateful for hard lessons learned and the chance to grow.

Quick Reminder

2011-12-05T17:30:00.011Z

©Jasmine Becket-Griffith 2010

Just a quick heads up to say, today is the last day to take part in the Yule Yoga Giveaway! As a reminder, all you have to do is post a comment on the thread saying what you like about yoga.

And the prize? Lots of yoga goodies - a book, a DVD, and a themed tarot deck *ooh*

Tomorrow, being Saint Nikolaus day when many on the continent give presents, I'll do the draw and announce the lucky winner. So, what have you got to lose?!

Fleeting

2011-12-05T06:00:00.020Z

I am charmed by the very different faces and feelings of the cards in this Journey Oracle.

Here, we are offered something fleeting. Is that the woman's fleeting glance in our direction, or the brief blooming of the blossoms over her head? Is it the passing attention of another, or the more enduring and cyclical changing of the seasons and cycles of life?

Either way, I guess this card calls on us to appreciate the moment, with all its joys and lessons. I am reminded, too, of the sand paintings created by certain American Indian tribes. These masterful artworks are designed to be enjoyed in the creation process, and seen briefly, but not to endure - that is part of their charm, that you must experience them in the moment.

It feels a bit weird today, my first Monday with no college knowing that there will be no "next term". However, I plan to make the most of it to try to get my essay finished. In this card I see a reminder that this essay is just a small blip in the course of my life, so not to stress about it too much and just do it! Then I can take time for the other fleeting pleasures, like reading a novel or creating a video blog ;)

I am grateful for the reminder to enjoy whatever I am doing in the moment, without regrets.

The Adventurer

2011-12-04T06:00:00.006Z

The Journey Oracle shows its Steampunk side today, with this adventurous card.

The Adventurer looks ready and willing to head off and explore the world. Whether floating off in a hot air balloon, firing up the engine of a small plane, or jetting off planet in her spaceship, it is having a spirit for new exploits and discoveries that leads her onward.

Sometimes, though, we don't have to leave our own homes, instead exploring ourselves - body, mind or spirit. We can take our body on an adventure by trying out a new yoga pose, or new hair colour. Our mind can explore new ideas, or its own boundaries. Meanwhile, our spirit can journey to other dimensions, be uplifted in prayer, chant or meditation, or melt into the flow of the universe.

As for me, I'm unsure what the day ahead holds. Perhaps a yoga practice, maybe a walk on the local heath, certainly some food, but salad, sandwich or soup, I don't yet know. Go on, call me an adventurer :)

I am grateful for the excitement of life and all its possibilities.

The Guardian

2011-12-03T06:00:00.022Z

After yesterday's thoughts about the Goddess, I decided to draw from the Journey Oracle this week. This 46-card deck, designed by Adrienne Trafford and published by Schiffer, offers images of women and situations, and is very feminine.

There are several cards in the deck which are horizontal, rather than vertical, and as I shuffled I hoped that one would come up some time this week. No sooner wished for than materialised, as for this very first day I drew the Guardian. Somewhat reminiscent of yesterday's card, this red-haired beauty wears green jewellry and has vines twined about her arms. She cradles an egg with a crack in it, while in the background are castles in the sky, formed by the clouds.

This card speaks to me of divine protection, and perhaps also of offering this protection to others, nurturing them so that they can become who they are.

Today, what I need to nurture is my own creativity, as I work on my final essay again. I'm really hoping I may get it finished ahead of the December 12th deadline. Goddess willing...

I am grateful for spiritual nurturance, and the chance to bring my ideas into being.

The Wheel Turns

2011-12-02T20:20:00.006Z

Just a very quick heads-up to say that I have now taken over the TABI Tarot blog, too. It will be less personal than this blog, but hopefully still a fun read. For my very first post in charge of the TABI blog, I've done a little reading with the Wildwood - why don't you come check it out here.

You don't have to be a member of TABI to find something interesting over there, but it might just tempt you to join :)

By the way, if the post titles are the same here and there, that doesn't mean the actual posts will be the same!

Dedicated to Brighid

2011-12-02T06:00:00.020Z

I adore this depiction of the Three of Pentacles from the Wheel of the Year Tarot (Lo Scarabeo, 2011).

For a little while now I have been feeling a desire to spend more time exploring my connection with the Goddess, and particularly through feeling creative. In this sense, her aspect as Brighid, goddess of creativity and inspiration, calls to me. I see this represented here, with an artist painting a beautiful image of a female figure swathed in life-giving green, with a golden triquetra headband. The image is framed by a gold border, with the triple aspects of the moon in the three circles of the arch. Vines grow around the image, reminding us of the Goddess' connection to growth and abundance.

His focus on the image, his inspiration, make me think of Joanna Powell-Colbert's current work-in-progress on the Crone (first post here). She has been showing her artistic process step by step, as well as explaining her creative inspiration. I see that dedication in this artist, too.

Unfortunately, I am no artist. When I put pen to paper, what comes out is never what I intended. I'm sure if I dedicated time and energy to studying art I would improve, but it's not something I've ever felt I had a particular aptitude for. My creative energy goes more into making up songs or cooking something tasty, or writing :) Yet the pull to create something visual remains.

I won't be doing anything about it just at the moment, as I still have my essay to complete. Still, the seed has been sown, and I shall keep thinking about what I can create in the name of the Goddess.

I am grateful for creative inspiration, wherever and whenever it strikes.

Arwen's Blooming Spread

2011-12-01T13:15:00.019Z

Recently, Arwen (of Tarot by Arwen) posted a spread which I really like the sound of. The basic premise is that it looks at statements for living a happy and authentic life. So, I decided that before finishing with the Wheel of the Year Tarot I would use it with this spread.

The positions are:

Card 0: Querent’s current center
Card 1: Embrace Joy
Card 2: Inspire Hope
Card 3: Cultivate Love
Card 4: Build Intimacy
Card 5: Celebrate Life
Card 6: Live Authentically

While Arwen defined some of these as where we already are, I thought I'd let the card itself tell me whether it was a positive or negative, something I am doing or something I need to do. In this, I am following what Lisa Frideborg Lloyd (of Tarotize) beautifully described in her recent post on why she doesn't use reversals.

Card 0 - Current Center - 8 of Swords

This rather different depiction of the 8 of Swords represents extremely well where I am now. I have a sick child, and that does affect what I think about, how I see myself, and my overall happiness, as well as my sense of being tied - to him, to home, in my time, thoughts and energy.

So, what can I learn from this card? Perhaps that acknowledging that currently Big Boy is the biggest influence on my life and my sense of whether I am happy and living well. That being so, how can I find the positive in this? How can I support myself? Hopefully, the rest of the spread will shed some light...

Card 1 - Embrace Joy - 4 of Swords

This card makes a lot of sense to me, too. My life has felt very pressurised and overly full for the last little while, between Big Boy, working for a living (even if part time), studying, blogging etc.

So, what will help me embrace joy at this moment is to slow down and take a break, to hibernate a little. Fortunately, this should be possible soon - I hand in my last essay on the 12th of December, and after that I have no pressing deadlines for my Masters, and work is fairly light at the moment, too.

Card 2 - Inspire Hope - Knight of Wands

How can I inspire hope in others, what is or should be my outward reflection? This seems almost too obvious: what is called for is an air of enthusiasm, a sunny disposition, a willingness to take on new challenges. I'm not sure if this is how others see me. Perhaps a little, certainly I do like taking on projects I enjoy and believe in. This can clearly have a shadow side - as pointed out in Card 1 saying I need to take a bit of a break. However, getting on with things is a good way to keep hope alive in myself, too - if I'm doing things I enjoy, then there must be some good in that, even if it is sometimes tiring.

It's strange, I would have expected a somewhat calmer card here - people often comment on my air of calm in the face of life's challenges. Then again, perhaps that is why I need a bit more fire and enthusiasm. Hmm, this is the card I find hardest to interpret, any thoughts would be welcome (for all the rest, too, of course).

Card 3 - Cultivate Love - 7 of Pentacles

Arwen actually talked about love being like a garden that requires cultivation, and what more perfect card for that than this 7 of Pentacles. Not only does it require our attention, but this is a long-term project - it's not just a question of watering once and no longer worrying about it, but rather watering, fertilising, pruning, weeding, and then doing it all again. And yet, what this card also says is that this work is worthwhile, because through it we earn the fruits of love - companionship, passion, joy, shared moments, the juiciness of life.

Another thing that I see here is the fact that my Dear One and I are "working" at having another baby. This is a way for us to cultivate love in our family, as we feel it will be good for us as a couple, for Big Boy to have a sibling to play with, and as a way for us all to have an experience which isn't just about ill-health. Once again, this may just be my wishful thinking, but certainly the "work" we're putting into the project also helps us cultivate love ;)

Card 4 - Build Intimacy - 5 of Wands

When I first saw this card, I thought it showed what challenges building intimacy. Competition can be a poison to a relationship. However, what I also see is two people, or perhaps two aspects of a person, that balance one another out.

Being intimate with myself may require a balance between shadow and light, an acceptance of both the smooth and the rough of life. Likewise, in relationship it can be good to have difference between people, so long as it is accepted and valued, rather than seen as an obstacle. And after all, wouldn't life be boring if we all agreed on everything all the time?

Looking back at Arwen's reading for herself, she comments that intimacy induces a bit of stress in her, and I think that's true for me, too. Certainly, allowing myself to be vulnerable, and being able to open to myself or to an other can be a challenge, and that may be another side to this card.

Card 5 - Celebrate Life - 3 of Chalices

What do I need to celebrate? At first this card seems to be another *d'oh* moment. Just celebrate! Thinking about it some more, though, what I see is three women celebrating the birth of something. Two things emerge from this.

Firstly, that I need to focus more on my friendships, on making time to see friends and enjoy their company. Two of my best friends and I are trying to organise a "witchy weekend", where we get together, talk, meditate, read the tarot, cast spells, practise yoga, and just generally support ourselves and each other. This card suggests I should make sure this happens - that it's something I need in my life. However, making more time for friends needn't just be about special occasions, but is a daily thing - emailing or ringing, meeting up a bit more often.

Secondly, this card reminds me to celebrate successes and new projects or news, however big or small. So, I'm already planning a nice meal with my Dear One and one of my brothers for the evening of 12th December, after handing in my last essay for the Masters I've been doing for the last two years. Likewise, a good friend from University, who I've known now for 21 years, is expecting his first child in the next couple of weeks. Another reason to celebrate! Another friend has been offered a job and may be moving away for three years - sad but also good for him, hopefully. So, this says to me to take the time to celebrate with friends, to support one another, and show our joy in each others' lives.

Card 6 - Live Authentically - 6 of Chalices

For me, this card speaks of living authentically by living in the moment, rather than in the past or in dreams of the future. The Six of Chalices is so often seen as being about the resurgence of dreams from the past, but thinking of past joys does little to support me in the present. Likewise, it's all well and good to have hopes and plans to work towards, but if these take the place of recognising and enjoying where I am right now, then I'm not living authentically. So, for me this is definitely a card about what not to do.

I really enjoyed using this spread, and will try to take the suggestions that have come from it to heart. Thanks Arwen :)

I hope others will also agree that this is no fluffy-bunny deck, despite its cartoon flavour. For me this reading was one of those times when the card images themselves seemed ever so appropriate, even more than traditional meanings alone, and where variations opened up whole new areas of thought.

I hope you'll let me know what you think: of the deck, the spread, and the reading :)

Deeply Dippy

2011-12-01T06:00:00.030Z

Wow, what a change from yesterday's knight! Today the Wheel of the Year Tarot (Lo Scarabeo 2011) offers up the Knight of Chalices.

With a rather goofy smile he sits calmly atop his white horse, with butterflies flitting around him and daffodils at his feet. His horse has a very simple leather bridle, and a lilac saddle blanket with the rund for spring under a simple leather saddle. As for his clothes, no armour here! Instead he wears a yellow lilac and purple outfit and looks ready for a party rather than a battle. He holds out a large chalice towards us, and his long blond hair flows over his shoulder. I can imagine him pulling out some instrument and bursting into song at any moment, serenading his love. The song that echoes in my head is Deeply Dippy :D I'd never seen the video before, and funnily enough some of their shirts are not far off this Knight's for colourfulness and foppishness!

Well, my Dear One is out tonight, so I don't see much romance for me today. Instead, perhaps this card indicates a change of perspective - that I will start to see life in a more positive light, feeling hopeful and actually feeling the new beginnings that have been heralded by several cards this week.

I am grateful for new energy and transformed thoughts.

Once More Unto the Breach

2011-11-30T06:00:00.036Z

Charging into battle today comes the Knight of Swords.

In this Wheel of the Year Tarot (Lo Scarabeo, 2011) the Knight of Swords rides a black hose with a purple and gold harness and saddle decorated with the pagan rune for winter. He rides out with sword in hand, and his armour is seriously spikey! Dashing through slushy snow, nothing will stop him reaching his goal.

I see the horse's tack suggesting that the horse is the wiser part of this partnership. The Knight can get carried away by his thoughts and desire to move forward, whereas the horse trusts its instincts more. The Knight is exiting from a portculis, leaving the safety of the castle behind him, heading out into who knows what. But then, that's part of the charm of the Knight of Swords: he goes where his search for information and new ideas takes him, paying little heed to others, or to his own security.

I wonder where my essay will take me today? Will I come across some interesting new information in one of the books which I have just skimmed so far? Or will I realise I have let some idea run away with me, and need to back it up with a lot more evidence?

In the wider world, today there is a public sector strike as teachers and others try to dissuade the government from proposed pension cuts. I support the teachers - they're already not paid a huge amount. I'd far rather see a cut in arms purchases or the standing army. But then, unlike this Knight, I'm a pacifist at heart :)

I am grateful for my curiosity and desire to learn.

Thaw

2011-11-29T06:00:00.017Z

Once again, the Wheel of the Year Tarot (Lo Scarabeo, 2011) shows us the changing faces of the seasons.

In this version of Temperance, a fairy kneels by the side of a small waterfall, pouring water from an ice-encrusted jug into a flower-bedecked one. Behnind her to the left the earch is covered with snow, while to her right spring flowers pop up from the fresh, green grass. She herself seems to be a creature of ice - snow-pale skin and gossamer wings - yet she wears flowers in her hair and a short, summer dress. The place where she kneels, by the river bank, is bare earth - neither snowy nor green. She is at the liminal point, in-between.

This card reminds me that, in any given situation, it's not just about getting the right mix of ingredients, or balancing the different elements, but also about getting our timing right! Certainly, that feels pertinent to the fact that I shall be seeing clients today. Say something at the right time and it helps, say it at the wrong time and you can set the whole process back. Talk about pressure *eek*

I am grateful for the help of the universe in knowing when to speak and when to keep silent.

Sowing the Seed

2011-11-28T06:00:00.026Z

It's time to get on with things, according to today's card from the Wheel of the Year Tarot (Lo Scarabeo, 2011).

In this Ace of Pentacles, a little green fairy sits on a harvest wreath holding a large pentacle decorated with an ear of corn. All about are bright red flowers, green grass, and some earth with more pentacles scattered like seeds.

To me, this card speaks of sowing a seed, making a start on some project to do with finances or the material. Investing in the future! That could be starting a new diet or exercise regime, applying for a job, or starting up a new business.

It's strange, and yet not, for this card to come up today. It is the last day of my Masters - an end after two years of hard work. And yet, not so strange, as this marks the start of a new phase on this journey towards a change of profession. There's still a long distance to where I hope to go - I need to finish my last essay in the next two weeks, continue seeing clients, and start work on my dissertation. Still, it's good to acknowledge what I have achieved so far, and to also recognise that this marks a new beginning.

I am grateful for the reminder to give thanks for what is over and look forward to what is still to come.

The Wheel of the Year

2011-11-27T06:00:00.025Z

Well, I guess this is a case of wheels within wheels ;) The Wheel of the Year Tarot (Lo Scarabeo, 2011) shows different seasons in each of the suits of the Minor Arcana. Meanwhile, Majors are attributed according to what season, or mix of seasons, fits best according to the author.

Today's card, then, is X - The Wheel, and shows all the turns of the yearly seasons. A perfect reminder that change is a constant, life doesn't stop, and we need to accept and appreciate the cycles of life. Perhaps, too, a suggestion to enjoy wherever you are on the wheel - each season has its own charms and delights, as well as pitfalls and difficulties.

My MIL is coming for a visit today. She's someone I get on well with, and value. Sadly, she's been through quite a lot recently, so I hope this card indicates that things are beginning to change for her, bringing renewed joy even as the weather here grows colder and the nights longer. Likewise, I am looking forward to a new part of my life beginning once my last essay is out of the way.

I am grateful for the variety of life, and for the potential for change and a new set of challenges and possibilities.

Tree House

2011-11-26T06:00:00.025Z

This week I have decided to draw from Lo Scarabeo's Wheel of the Year Tarot (2011). This deck is authored by Maria Caratti and illustrated by Antonella Platano. I've had it for a while, and done quite a lot of readings for both myself and clients with it. For me, it's definitely a working deck, despite its cartoon-like qualities. I like the fact that it is RWS-based, but with a distinctly pagan feel, and playful, vibrant images.

Today's card is the Four of Wands. I find it interesting the way the deck's creators have chosen to frame the image with four wands, to supplement the imagery, but also giving the card a different feel. To me, it makes it seem more story-like - a picture that mom might hang on the wall of the home as a reminder of a beautiful moment between daughter and father. Which just adds to the idea of making something together - not just the tree house, but a home and family that includes the person who "took" the picture. I know it's not photographic, but that's still the sense that I get from this card :)

While I still have plenty to go before I finish my essay, today I will also be taking some family time to enjoy Big Boy and my Dear One. Since I was away for a few days a couple of weeks ago, Big Boy wants to sit on my lap whenever possible. Still, Daddy is sooo much more fun than Mummy, so BB plays with dad while sitting on me! Oh, the joys of being a beloved seat ;) I guess, though, it makes me the foundation on which he builds his sense of fun and exploration, and that's a pretty good thing, too.

I am grateful for the simple pleasures of family games and togetherness.

Soapbox

2011-11-25T15:30:00.024Z

Right from the get-go I want you to know, I am in no way affiliated with any of the websites or products I am going to rave about today. They're just lovely things, and talented people, so I wanted to "Share the Love".

Today, my soapbox is both literal and metaphorical. Last week, I ordered some soaps from the amazing Kismet's Companion. They arrived in this box:

These soaps are delightful! They are prettily packaged, look gorgeous (you'll have to check out her pages to see what they look like, as these are gifts and not getting unwrapped), smell delicious and work a treat. Reason I know? I ordered some as gifts last year, too, and a small slice was included as a freebie. I've been using it ever since :)

I felt a little disappointed, though, when I read yesterday that Kismet's Companion and another of my favourite retailer's, Ania M, were offering a "Share the Love" promotion, where if you buy from one, you get a discount from the other. I adore Ania M's tarot bags, and have quite a few. Here are some, at least one of which you won't find on her site, as it was custom made for me!

However, these ladies being the compassionate people that they are, after I caved and ordered another couple of bags from Ania, KC refunded me the discount I would have got from her if I'd bought yesterday instead of last week. How cool is that!! Together, they look like this:

I have to say, I like this bag even better, because of the frill and inner lining. Although not all the bags on Ania's site offer this option, if you include a message to say you want it, she will custom make any bag with the extra, though it does bump the price up a little. Still, I think it's really worth it.

And just to add in another of my favourite UK-based lovelies, the deck inside that bag is the Tarot of the Sidhe, by Emily Carding. It is the semi-trimmed version - sides removed - rather than the fully trimmed version I blogged about here.

So, that's my sharing for the day. And who knows, one of those soaps may make its way into my Yule Yoga Giveaway. If you haven't yet taken part, you have til the 6th of December...

Judgement

2011-11-25T06:00:00.029Z

For this last draw with Iowan's Tarot I finally got a Major, and coincidentally the only one that hasn't had its title changed. I think it a shame, actually. I like a lot of the other Majors, which represent quite different takes on traditional ideas. For example, her version of the Hierophant is called "Djeli", which I just had to google. Wikipedia tells me that this is a West African storyteller, a mixture of poet, praise singer and history teller much like a bard, which I find a very appropriate, positive and beautiful take on this sometimes problematic card.

However, here we have a traditional title, with an image that seems far closer to notions of Justice. The Egyptian figure with scales bearing a feather and a heart, standing between two columns, echoes many versions of Maat as Justice. Still, I guess Maat's association with the Underworld does make her appropriate for Judgement, so often portrayed as people rising from their graves at the call of an angel. This doesn't have that sense of moving on that I normally associate with this Major, though that may be a road in the background, leading who-knows-where. I'll be interested to hear what others make of this card.

Not sure how it relates to my day, either. I'm still in essay mode, and I can't see me finishing and moving on for a while yet. I'm also seeing a client, so maybe there will be some movement there. Or maybe I will have my own epiphany...

I am grateful for opportunities to assess where I am and where I'm going.

Second Postal Surprise

2011-11-24T12:45:00.032Z

So, just minutes ago the postman dropped this item through my door:

I wondered, "What can it be?" When I saw it was from Llewellyn I was even more confused. "I'm sure I haven't ordered anything from them that would have to be rolled" I thought. Then I saw the sender's name - Barbara Moore - and I gave a little squeal!

A while back, Babs ran a Steampunk Competition through her Steampunk Tarot website, offering one lucky reader the chance to get their hands on a prototype deck, five or six months ahead of the official launch. I took part in the competition, though I wasn't lucky enough to win. However, after the fact Babs announced that everyone who entered would win a consolation prize, and asked us to name our favourite card. I said the High Priestess. And so, this lovely lady lay inside the Llewellyn parcel:

High Priestess - Steampunk Tarot

Isn't she gorgeous? And what an outfit! Has something of a trickster air to her, too, I'd say: don't expect her to share all her secrets. I love the glowing crystal ball, the cards on the blue cloth, and the wheels and cogs in the background :) The image is about 26 x 46 cms (10 x 18 inches for you non-metric people). I'm going to get her framed, and will post when it's done (may take me a while, essays and Christmas being current priorities).

So, a huge thank you to Barbara! And I can't wait for the deck to come out...

Resolution

2011-11-24T06:00:00.021Z

Iowan's Tarot has a very modern feel to it, as well as being "ethnic". I can well imagine reading with it for someone who doesn't like "old-fashioned" stuff.

Today's card is a perfect case in point. A biker stands with his back to us, gazing at the open road ahead of him. Out in the distance, a nearly-full moon shines down on the rolling landscape. On the back of his leather jacket are six crossed spears (swords). This perfectly captures the idea of moving forward towards the unknown, hoping to find a place of greater calm.

Last week brought me a greater sense of purpose again. I made the choice to get on with my essays because I don't want to still be stuck in this place of deadlines and other people's requirements. Today I see my therapist again, and I wonder whether our session will help me find greater clarity about where I am headed after this last bit of essay craziness is resolved...

I am grateful to once again see the road ahead of me.

Discord

2011-11-23T06:00:00.022Z

I'm not quite sure what to make of today's card from Iowan's Tarot.

In this version of the Five of Staves (Wands), we see a woman sitting curled up with negative words all around her: murder, war, social apathy, depression, alcoholism etc. These are negative situations the world and other people subject her to, whether personally or at a remove. I can see here the idea of being attacked and needing to fight for herself. However, these are in many ways ideas and words she is fighting, which makes it seem more of a Spears/Swords kind of thing. Still, I guess it is the fact that these ideas are put into practice by people that makes this a fight against others.

My plan for the day mainly involves essay writing. A battle with words and ideas, that's for sure. And given my essay topic is intersubjectivity - our relationship with others - I guess that fits this card, too.

I am grateful not to have much discord in my life.

Trespass

2011-11-22T06:00:00.041Z

Hmm, Iowan's Tarot has served up two swords cards in a row. I guess it's trying to communicate something :b

In this version of the Seven of Spears (Swords) I see a woman with five spears held in one hand, and a further two forming a cross at her feet, slightly behind her. She stands before a thick fence that separates her from a town. Her feet point away from the fence, while her gaze travels to the town beyond.

This feels very different to traditional Seven of Swords images where we see someone sneaking away with swords/ideas/bounty. She stands proud, rather than looking sneaky. While the keyword "trespass" is more closely aligned with the traditional perspective, what I see in the image itself is very different. There is a sense that she has a lot of ideas, but is being kept away from others by some kind of blockage. Perhaps she feels unwelcome. Certainly, the keyword "trespass" can also be taken to suggest that she would be seen as an interloper. This resonates with the experience of many minority groups, feeling excluded from mainstream society. While I see a certain wistfulness in her gaze and pose, I also read a sense of determination and having the resources she needs to take her own path.

Today I see clients, who may well feel this way - cut off from the joys of regular society through their experience and pain. Furthermore, today I hope to start writing the last of my essays, having finished one on Sunday and another yesterday (yay me!) I hope to bring a challenging perspective, looking in from the outside, so to speak.

I am grateful for having plenty of ideas to work with, and not needing to conform to others' prescriptions.

Compromise

2011-11-21T06:00:00.046Z

While connected to the Rider Waite Smith tarot, Iowan's Tarot has a novel, modern and sometimes psychedelic take on the cards, while using "primitive" suit icons - a strange mix, but one which I feel works.

This can clearly be seen here, in the Two of Spears (Swords). A man sits as though meditating, blindfolded, atop a scales. In front and back of him, two large spears cross over, tipped with double-forked prongs. Arching over him is a depiction of Nut, the Egyptian goddess of the night sky. In some ways, the symbols seem more appropriate to Justice than the Two of Swords. Which makes me think of the Wildwood depiction, titled Injustice (you can see a pic here from Priestess Tarot). Yet in Iowan's Tarot the keyword is "compromise".

So, a weighing up of different aspects of a situation from a place of calm and acceptance. The goddess blesses his endeavour, recognising his openness to the fates, his mental clarity uncluttered by preconceptions.

My second to last day at college beckons, a penultimate opportunity to assess where I am going with this. A chance, too, to build bridges for the future, and find an equilibrium with friends and others alike. After the course, I may never see some of these people again, strange after two years when we have shared so much.

And in the evening, group supervision. Always a balancing act - who needs what and when. I feel a little guilty that the group has agreed to my going first if I feel the need, given how early I am generally up with Big Boy. And yet, surely better that than me failing to go again, which has also happened fairly often. So, the compromise is that I go but may leave early.

I am grateful for the kindness of others.

Poise?

2011-11-20T06:00:00.013Z

For this second day with Iowan's Tarot I drew another court card - the Counsel of Staves (Page of Wands).

The keyword that Iowan has chosen here is "poise". It's not one I would normally associate with the Page of Wands: more full of youthful joy and playfulness in my eyes. Perhaps that poise is simply the confidence and delight in life this card represents - a faith in themselves and in the benificence of the universe.

Not sure I'm feeling much of that at the moment, and maybe that's the point. I need to draw on this trust in the world and in myself. I have promised myself that if I can finish one of my essays today I won't try for an extension on the other big one. I'd rather not have it dragging out over Christmas...

I am grateful for the message to trust in my abilities.

Mist-Dancer

2011-11-19T06:00:00.068Z

This week, as promised, I will be pulling from the independently published Iowan's Tarot. This is an African-American deck with changed suit names: Staves (Wands), Gourds (Cups), Spears (Swords) and Cowries (Pentacles). The Courts are titled Counsel (Page), Rhythm (Knight), Wellspring (Queen), and GateKeeper (King), which I think is an interesting and useful approach to the Court roles. Also, all but one Major has been renamed.

For this first draw I received the Rhythm of Gourds (Knight of Cups). All the Rhythm cards show a woman in a warrior-type asana position. Here, she wears a blue body suit, straddles a small stream pouring down boulders, and holds a carp-decorated ball on her upraised hand. I find it interesting that, when I wrote a post associating warrior poses with the tarot Knights, this is pretty much the pose that I chose for the Knight of Cups! And speaking of yoga, a quick reminder that I'm running a yule yoga giveaway, if you haven't taken part yet :)

This image suggests to me an ability to be open hearted, to go with the flow emotionally, and yet to still be strong and dedicated. Depending on my mood, I can imagine associating the carp with saying what you think the other wants to hear (Koi ⇒ coy). It can also be associated with love and friendship - according to wikipedia the Japanese have another word that sounds just like koi and means love and affection. Both interpretations fit my ideas about the Knight of Cups.

I really like the title Rhythm for this Knight equivalent. It has a great sense of movement, and yet also a sense of power and naturalness. When I think of the Rhythm of Gourds, I imagine water sloshing round inside a gourd, not a rigid sound but rather one that is variable and flowing.

This morning I'll be working on my essay a bit more, talking about emotions and the fluid process of working with a client. This afternoon we go to a house warming party, where there'll be plenty of liquid flowing, as well as music to sway to ;D

I am grateful for times of emotional openness and joy.

Postal Surprise

2011-11-18T17:00:00.003Z

Outer box, with a fork for perspective

Last Saturday the postman came by with a parcel. I was a little surprised. Although I had a deck on order, this parcel was big! Still, when I read the label (removed in the pic) it said Deck of Cards...

Tugging off all the tape and the label, I plunged through brown packing paper to find a still-rather-large black box inside. Iowan's Tarot - an independently created and published deck I've been following for at least a year - was nestled inside.

Outer box and inner box

On to the next layer: I opened the black box to find a very hand-sized deck, a matching bag, and a big card - almost the size of the box when folded - with a wheel of the Major images and some spread suggestions (not pictured here).

Boxes 1+2, the bag and deck

While the packaging is definitely excessively big, the deck is a lovely size, and very interesting. The cards were all out of order, so I had to go through everything to check they were all there. That was my excuse, anyway, as I was supposed to be working on an essay at the time *d'oh*. I shall be using it as my deck of the week, and hope to write up a review of it at some point, too. After my essays are all handed in!

Finally, the deck!

Cool Cat

2011-11-18T06:00:00.036Z

I really like today's card from the Joie de Vivre Tarot.

The King of Swords is a card whose energy I have argued elsewhere is sometimes seen too negatively. Here we certainly have a more positive view of him. A cool cat with a red hat, a blue cape, a white-frilled neck cuff, purple shoes, a brown jerkin and trousers, a green bird on his arm and a sword held casually, blade down, in his left hand.

His clothing suggest both stability (brown), an ability to express himself clearly (blue), wisdom (purple) and passion (red). The fact that his shoes are purple hints that he isn't entirely practical - more in touch with lofty ideals than with the everyday. Yet his brown underclothes do say that he is stable in his approach to any matter, just that the matters he approaches may be more on a mental than a physical level.

There are clouds around him, a challenge to his clarity of vision. Yet the bird suggests he knows how to use resources to find a different perspective. And the sword suggests he is at ease with his thoughts and mind.

Another day when I could use some of this clear-sightedness and determination. Have to finish my essay by Monday and it's dragging on horribly. I'm also seeing a client and having supervision, so clarity of expression is called for, too.

I am grateful for my mind, and for times when it is clear and focused.

Tripping Over Your Own Feet

2011-11-17T06:00:00.022Z

Today's card from the Joie de Vivre Tarot had me stumped for a bit.

I normally think of the Page of Coins (Pentacles) as being a very stable chap. Still learning, but quite intent, it is a card I often associate with yoga - that sense of learning something both physical and spiritual. Here, though, we have an octopus-y character - hinting at cups/water - standing on a tree branch reaching for a sunny pentacle - wands/fire - with various bizarre fish/rabbit/slug creatures floating around him - swords/air. Or maybe it's all underwater, though that isn't obvious from the colour scheme. Either way, where is the pentacle-y earth energy?

Where I see a link to more traditional notions of what the Page of Coins represents is in the idea that he is reaching for something physical/spiritual, and that perhaps he needs to learn and understand his own physicality in order to be able to do this. The very fact of how ungrounded he is points to where his future learning lies. I can easily imagine him taking a spill, but getting up and trying again. There may also be an element of the message/messenger here - the pentacle shining in the sky as a beacon. The Page as the one who brings that beacon's message to us. Perhaps the weird creatures are there simply to remind us that we must be playful in our learning. Or as a dire warning of what can happen if you are not clear with your physical boundaries :)

How does this card relate to my day? Well, once again it falls on a day when I've planned in a longer yoga practice. Other than that, today I see both my personal therapist and also a family therapist - plenty of learning opportunities and perhaps a chance to acknowledge areas where I feel my boundaries could do with some bolstering - I'm not great at discipline, which Big Boy needs as otherwise he can hurt himself and others.

I am grateful for the many chances life offers me to learn, on so many levels.

Emotional Choices

2011-11-16T06:00:00.017Z

Paulina Cassidy created the lovely Joie de Vivre Tarot (U.S. Games, 2011) her second tarot after the well-received Paulina. She also has an oracle deck out soon called Witchlings, which looks rather fun ;)

Today's card is the Seven of Cups. I really like the way that her dress resembles sea-foam, and yet there are bats decorating it, too. Perhaps this says something about the way we perceive the choices offered to us in this card - we can be washed away by the emotions they provoke, or try to see beyond the surface using our intuition as a guide. And what of those choices? From inside flowers five birds poke out their heads, offering a heart, a star, a letter, a cherry and a musical note. Two more flowers contain a snake and a little ant or insect. The woman looks like she's trying to choose between the cherry, the stalk to which is held in her right hand, or the heart towards which she looks and reaches with her left hand. Still, perhaps she should take some more time to consider the other options, too...

For me today, though, I think the message is not to get entranced by the many things on offer, and just keep my focus - I need to work some more on my essay, it's getting urgent that I finish it.

I am grateful for the clarity of knowing what I need to choose.

Passing Through the Darkness

2011-11-15T06:00:00.023Z

The Joie de Vivre Tarot (U.S. Games, 2011) by Paulina Cassidy today shows us a less-than-joyful aspect of life - the Five of Coins (Pentacles).

No companion accompanies our cloaked woman with the strange, striped bunny ears. She walks through tangled undergrowth and bare branches, enveloped by grey. And yet, candle-topped pentacles guide her way, lights in the darkness. What I see here is a message about finding comfort in times of hardship. That comfort may come from doing something to feel physically protected (the cloak) or it may come from spiritual guidance (the candles). In any case, she seems to keep her sense of humour (striped bunny ears). Or perhaps they indicate that she is extra alert to danger - listening out for any possible problems.

Today I see clients again and this card reminds me of why I do this work - to try to be a support to others while they pass through the shadow of death. I try to help them find ways to look after themselves, and to reconnect to a sense of faith in the meaning of life.

I am grateful for the support we humans can offer one another.

Let's Get This Party Started!

2011-11-14T06:00:00.023Z

Paulina Cassidy's Joie de Vivre Tarot (U.S. Games, 2011) is extremely beautiful, highly whimsical, and rather quirky. Which is to say, I'm really enjoying it :)

Today's card is the Three of Cups. What I notice is that the three characters here each seem to be bringing something to the table, so to speak. The one on the right carries a flute, the one in the middle has cups which overflow, and the one on the left carries baskets of tempting fruit. Music, food, drink and good company - it's a party!

Yet the three friends, as well as offering different things, are also very disparate. One is a rabbit, the other looks mainly human besides the flower fountain that seems to grow from her hair, while the third is a mermaid.

In this card I see a celebration of our dissimilarities, and a willingness to enjoy life in all its variety and colour. A reminder that it can be fun to challenge our ways of being, and to expand our horizons through other people who are different to ourselves.

Today I am going into college and it's true that, although we are all studying the same subject, there is still a world of difference between us all. I hope I can appreciate that multiplicity and allow it to open my perspective and my heart.

I am grateful for all the different people who enrich my life.

Wondrous Winged Lion

2011-11-13T06:00:00.028Z

Well, the Joie de Vivre Tarot (U.S. Games, 2011) is certainly introducing itself with a bang!

For this second draw, I am greeted by Strength. A lion with wings and a heart-tipped tail stands on a tree branch, allowing a winged, flower-crowned woman to pet him. The lion, with dainty little fangs showing, seems to be leaning into the woman's caress and yet I'm unsure whether his gaze is loving or predatory. And perhaps that's as it should be: if the lion were completely tame, he would not hold up his side of the Strength equation!

He is all fiery energy, from his colours to his sun pendant, physically powerful and driven by his urges. Meanwhile she is calm and light, with a moon-like face and a crescent moon on her dress, reflective and nurturing. Acknowledging both aspects of our nature, and the spectrum in between, allows us to tap into our full potential, our strength.

Today we're planning a family walk in the autumnal sunshine. Perhaps I'll need to tap into my strength as we work on boundaries with Big Boy...

I am grateful for the acknowledgement that I don't just have to behave in one way all the time, that I can be a mutlitfaceted person and still be me.

Bouncing Balloon

2011-11-12T06:00:00.027Z

This week I will be drawing from the recently released Joie de Vivre Tarot by Paulina Cassidy (U.S. Games, 2011). My first impression is that these cards are beautiful and whimsical, and less busy than the Paulina Tarot.

For this first draw I was just shuffling and shuffling the deck (while reading something on a forum) and this card popped out to say hello. I have to say, the Sun seems to have a somewhat mournful demeanour. Still, the fellow flying on a strange sea-horse-like creature looks happy enough, holding the sun like a helium balloon in one hand, and a shining heart in the other. Youthful innocence and delight shine through.

Today I will try to finish the essay I was working on last week. Hope this card bodes well for my success in this endeavour. Perhaps it tells me I need to stay with the things about this topic which I enjoy, and reflect on the ways in which I may be naive about it.

I am grateful for this encouragement towards intellectual curiosity.

11/11/11 Reading

2011-11-11T17:00:00.000Z

This morning Tarotize published a post talking about her take on the numerology of today. Discussing it in conjunction with the moon's phases, she recommended using this as a time to do a reading on new beginnings and manifestation. Although I'm publishing this during the void of course time of the moon, I did the reading while it was still in Taurus (not that I know much about what that means, but I'm happy to take the word of someone wiser than me).

I just asked what I can manifest, though Tarotize talked about it in terms of love. Well, the cards definitely spoke to that precise question! I didn't define positions, just pulled three cards from the Steele Wizard Tarot, and the results were:

This new beginning will allow me to manifest my romantic side, my ability to give love, and to share. The Knight of Cups speaks to me of being more out-going with my emotions, willing to express how I feel. The Ace of Cups tells me I have a well of love to give, and to let that love flow generously without holding back.

Finally, the Maiden of Pentacles. This is one of the extra cards that Pamela Steele added to this deck. I like the idea of a youthful, feminine energy. As sellers of car insurance will tell you, insuring a young man has very different risks to insuring a young woman. With the addition of these Maiden cards, Pamela speaks to this difference that encompasses youthfulness but acknowledges the Maiden aspect of human nature.

What I see in this Maiden of Pentacles is someone who is shy yet flirtatious, just starting to explore what it means to have a sensual, sexual body. She may at times hide behind the physical or the material, yet she is also quite down-to-earth. So, a call to reconnect with the physical aspects of life, with sensuality, play and pleasure. Perhaps also a time to consider what to hide and what to reveal.

As I said above, I did this reading early this morning, but didn't have time to do the scanning/writing up etc. In the meantime, I had a little nap (as well as working etc). I awoke with an "aha". The above is a psychological/empowering reading of the cards, my normal modus operandi. And yet, the Maiden of Pentacles challenges me to consider what I choose to reveal.

When I woke up, I thought about the Ace of Cups being bookmarked by the Knight of Cups and the Maiden. My lover and I, enclosing a receptacle that, filled with our love, takes form and wells forth. We have been trying for several months now to conceive another child, and while it feels a little fraught with worry (would another child also have health issues, am I getting too old to have a child?), it also feels like a possibility for new and happier emotions. I have seen signs hinting at this in other readings, for example here, though I didn't mention that interpretation at the time. I hope that, if this is the start of a new phase, the chance of a seed being sown can be manifested, a manifestation of love.

In any case, I don't see the two interpretations - psychological/empowering and divinatory/predictive - as being opposing. Both could be true and relevant. For example, the advice I see in the psychological reading can only help the chance of making the divination come into being - being open, sensual and emotionally expressive is a good place to start when trying to make a baby ;D

I hope you'll wish me luck :)

Movement Cubed

2011-11-11T06:00:00.030Z

For this final draw with the Steele Wizard Tarot (by Pamela Steele) I received the Chariot.

I really like the fact that Pamela Steele has added more women to the cards in this deck, and challenged some gender stereotypes. For example, her Eight of Swords shows a bound man, rather than a woman. Meanwhile, here our chariot driver is a woman. She also added runes to a number of cards, including this one. The woman wears a brooch decorated with Raidho - the rune for wagon or chariot - and the horses' harnesses are decorated with the Ehwaz rune, signifying horse. This emphasises the travel and movement aspect of this card, thought the runes also speak of progress, teamwork, loyalty (Ehwaz) and evolution, decision and perspective (Raidho). Which I guess fits quite well with traditional Chariot associations of taming different aspects of ourselves in order to move forward.

I'm not sure if willpower alone will be enough to help me progress today. I'm supposed to see two clients, but my voice is still borderline absent. So, I have to decide whether to push on, at the risk of hurting my throat and perhaps not coming across very well with one client who is just starting today. Otherwise, I can ring to cancel our sessions and get on with my essays instead...

I am grateful for the ability to move forward one way or another.

On Manifestation

2011-11-10T06:00:00.034Z

Today's card from the Steele Wizard Tarot is the Magician.

There are some unusual aspects to this image which I rather like. While maintaining the idea of drawing down energy for manifestation, here that energy is visible in the form of little glowing stars. These pour forth from the Magician's upraised hand, and flow down into the pentacle-decorated cup he holds in his left hand. The active, dynamic suit emblems are present, but tucked away: a sword in his belt and a crystal-topped wand resting in the crook of his elbow. He doesn't need them, because their energy is manifest in him. However, he does use the passive suit emblems, the cup and pentacle, to gather that energy, suggesting the necessity of balance to actually manifest. Active energy takes form in the passive receptacle.

I also really like that here the lemniscate is part of a headband he wears - connecting this symbol of infinity with his third eye. Infinite manifestation comes from a clear connection with spirit.

Today I return home. As Picard would say: "Make it so."

I am grateful for the ability to create a life I love, and for the reminder that balance is vital in that process: if I didn't go away, I wouldn't appreciate being home; if I didn't work, I wouldn't appreciate the quiet times.